Jana Says

My (for now) ideal bookshelf

February 1, 2013 by Jana 29 Comments

For as long as I can remember, I’ve been an avid reader. It’s a common site to see me with my nose buried in a book and a ridiculous amount of books laying in wait on my nightstand. In fact, here’s what it looks like right now:

Not pictured are the 5 books on my iPad (for those who are interested, they are Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Won’t Stop Talking, What the Dog Saw, Sharp Objects, Little Women, and Les Miserables) and the Laura Ingalls Wilder biography I have on hold at the library. Which makes a total of 13 books. It’s pretty insane. (Also, as a side note, I think my library is conspiring against me because whenever I put books on hold, they all come in within days of each other. I can read fast but I am not a machine and I have a sort of life. I don’t know what they want me to do). But it’s a free hobby and it keeps me busy and out of trouble for the most part (although maybe books contribute a little bit to my insomnia). In fact, one of my reader’s Pinterest challenges to me this year is a type of book bingo and it’s the one I’m most excited for so far. Not only will it expose me to all kinds of books but it’s bingo. Who doesn’t love bingo?

I digress.

As a huge book nerd, one of the books I had on my list this year was “My Ideal Bookshelf”, which is essentially a collection of book lists from celebrity writers, chefs, photographers, and others. They each wrote a short essay describing why the books meant so much to them and then, next to each essay, was a painting of the titles. It was a pretty cool book but, overall, it made me feel like an illiterate fool. I had never heard of 95% of the books mentioned and, of the ones that I had heard of, I think I counted 6 that I had actually read (oddly enough, Judd Apatow and Chuck Klosterman, two people I highly respect, had books on their shelves that I had actually read. So that was fun for me). But it did make me start to think about what I would put on my ideal bookshelf.

I admit it’s kind of a weird thought because how do you pick your favorite books? Every book I read has made me smarter, improved my vocabulary, made me a better storyteller, and fostered a love of good grammar (including the books that suck. I’ve learned a lot from those, too). So how do I narrow it down? If you’re me, you think like this:

You need to move into a very tiny apartment. You have room for your necessities and only one shelf to devote to your books. While you can utilize the library or your e-reader for most of your reading, there’s just something comforting about having a bookshelf. So you think long and hard about it and you determine which ones you can read over and over again without getting bored and are entertaining every time you read them and you make a list of those. And if you’re me, your shelf contains these books (I’m not listing personal finance books because I already did that once and I don’t want to seem boring):

Quitter by Jon Acuff
The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton
Our Town by Thornton Wilder (it’s play. I know. But it’s going on the shelf)
I Know This Much is True by Wally Lamb
The Art of Racing in the Rain by Garth Stein
The Long Winter by Laura Ingalls Wilder
The Pact or Nineteen Minutes by Jodi Picoult (I can’t decide. Maybe both)
Let’s Pretend This Never Happened by Jenny Lawson aka The Bloggess
Downtown Owl and The Visible Man by Chuck Klosterman
Rest Rabbit Rest from the Sweet Pickles collection
Have a Little Faith by Mitch Albom
Where the Sidewalk Ends by Shel Silverstein

Maybe also The Hunger Games trilogy and The Glass Castle by Jeanette Walls.

That’s what I would put on it for now. I’m having a year of the classics, which is why you don’t see many of those on this list. I read some in high school and college but reading for an assignment is different than reading for fun. So maybe next year, I’ll revisit this post and update the list after I’ve read those.

Books have played such an integral part in my development as a writer and in my debt payoff journey. They provide a free escape, a free education, and so much more. My life is better because of books.

Okay, fellow book nerds. What does your ideal bookshelf look like?

10 money must haves for moms

January 30, 2013 by Jana 20 Comments

…and dads and grandparents and pretty much everyone else.

This idea came to me after seeing a picture on Facebook posted by Jen from People I Want To Punch In the Throat. While I love the original list (which you can find here) for its snark and sarcasm, I thought it might be a good idea to strip that away for a moment and think practically about the financial things we need. After all, without our finances in tact, how are we going to pay for the babysitter, wine, trips to Target, and girls’ night out?

We’re not.

So, here we go. My 10 money must haves:

A budget–you need to know where your money is going and how much you have coming in. Without this, you’re kind of screwed.
An emergency fund-because shit happens and you need to be prepared. If the 3-6 months is too intimidating, start small. But just start.
A menu plan–the single best way to save money at the grocery store.
A retirement savings plan–unless you want to work forever, you need to save for the day you stop working.
A will–because you will die. Best to be prepared and get everything straight ahead of time.
A marketable skill–we all have one. And we all can do something that, in the event of an economic pinch, can bring in some extra income.
A frugal hobby–shopping is fun, but why not pick up a book from the library? It’s just as time consuming but saves a ton of money in the long run. Maybe filter the savings to your EF or retirement savings.
A money savvy friend–we all need someone we can go to with our money questions and concerns. Find one of those people and put her in your friend arsenal with the fun friend and the creative friend.
A motivational motto–I like having some saying that get me through tough days. I even have an entire Pinterest board devoted to them. Print one and put it somewhere conspicuous for the days you doubt yourself.
A good night’s sleep–because nothing enables bad decisions, especially financial ones, more than being tired.

Put these 10 into place and you’re ahead of everyone who says they can’t control their finances. Because when you look at it like this, it’s really not that hard.

And in case you want it in pretty graphic form:

DIY tips from near death experiences

January 28, 2013 by Jana 14 Comments

This is a guest post from my friends and new bloggers Jack and Diane at Marriage in Debt who’ve decided it is time to get out of debt. And what better way to do it other than in the public?! Zany adventures are promised as they first work to get rid of over $78,000 of “traditional” debt (not including student loans or houses – those numbers are coming later). No gimmicks, no schemes, no inheritance, no lottery winnings here. Just plain hard work as a computer programmer and professional fundraiser figure this all out.

She Said:

someecards.com - Well babe, you've definitely given a new meaning to DIY. It no longer means do it yourself but stands for how dangerously incompetent you are. — This is not the picture they provided. My computer hates me and wouldn’t upload those. So this is the substitute.

It was a crisp day on the street lined with homes filled with dozens of occupants attending the local university. Inside this one specific tall white beat-down house with the lopsided porch lived five guys. Nope, they didn’t start the hamburger chain (Jana’s note: though wouldn’t it be awesome if they did? Free fries for life!). They were all brilliant in school and studying engineering, accounting, geology, education, and mathematics (combined GPA of about 18.6). On this particular day, while also trying various methods to cure the hangover, they were gathered around the doorway to the laundry room. Quite simply, chicks don’t dig wet clothes and they were all too broke to call a professional. The math major was up to his elbows in parts and wires until the guys who studied finances, rocks, and actual mechanical engineering were satisfied the dryer was finally fixed. Confidentially the math major began to plug the new cord into the wall and then attempted to bolt it to the dryer. All stared in disbelief as a blazing bright blue arc of 220 volts shot from one of his hands to the other. There were no permanent damage (we think). It should also be noted that the washer had recently leaked and the math major was standing in this puddle of water. The engineer simply quipped, “cool!”

Ladies and gentleman, my confession at the moment is that I actually married the math major. (Jana’s note: I married someone who tried to do pyrotechnics with grain alcohol. I think Diane and I should get together and compare notes on what the hell we were thinking.)

The dryer incident was not the last of the near-death handyman incidents. I may have forgiven the great ceiling-fan-wire-melting-during-the-heat-wave-with-a-newborn-baby incident but certainly have not forgotten (obviously)! There has also been successful stories involving car alternators, oven doors, lawnmowers, and, of course, anything computer related.

My preference is to pick up the phone and call in an expert. But Jack likes to tinker with it first. Oddly enough, when the decision came to either hire a professional or attempt to fix on our own, the final verdict is almost always centered on the green paper bills.

He Said:

Yep, it’s no secret that I refuse to call experts and, armed with whatever information I can pull off of the internet, I can fix ANYTHING! Do I have the tools, skills, knowledge, or any business tackling 90% of these projects? NO!

When looking at a project, you have to make the decision between DIY or hire the professionals. That has nothing to do with pride nor ego nor being-a-man bravado. This is about getting the job right that costs as little as possible.

Research! The internet is a wonderful thing and can be used for more than just porn and fantasy football leagues. Surprised, right? Yeah, me too. Most vehicles have specific community boards where you can ask any question or search for any solution. Most appliances have self-help boards that include step-by-step instructions with pictures. Just put “How to..” into Google or Bing or Ask, and watch the knowledge come pouring onto your screen
Take a quick stop at YouTube. Our Jeep lost all power to the driver’s side door. I kid you not, there was a video of a guy demonstrating how to find the broken wire and solder it back together on the same exact model with the same interior and exterior colors. It was uncanny that I peeked out the window. I have used YouTube to help install heating elements in dryers, patch sheetrock, and setup a garage door opener. It is amazing what is out there, and what people have recorded themselves fixing over the years. Be aware that they always make it seem easier on the screen than it is in real life.
Consider your tools. If there is a mistake I always make, it’s that I do not have the right tools. I think I can get by with the tools I have rather than ponying up the dough for the right ones. And, each time, I end up doing more damage or spending three times as long finishing the project. Time is worth money too. Consider the investment in the right tools for this job that you will need to purchase.
Duct tape and WD-40 work well in a pinch. When the back spoiler of our Trailblazer fell off on a family vacation, the always versatile duct tape held everything together until we got back home. And, when it turned out to be a $700 repair job, it held for a couple of months while we saved up the money. Our neighbors were super impressed with that car sitting in our driveway, but we paid $700 for the repair, not $700 plus 18% interest on a credit card.
Utilize social media. We all have friends that have done these types of things before and can offer you some guidance. When our air conditioner unit fan stopped turning, we posted the problem on Facebook. Ten suggestions later telling us to “kick it” and ..that actually did work. So ignore all male impulses to NOT ASK and realize the end-goal is to get the project done right
If you have friends or family that does this type of work professionally, utilize them. The best thing you can do is bribe them with some beer, have them show you how to do it, use their tools, and hopefully you can get the project down for the cost of parts only. And, the project is done right the first time.
If after all of these options above you decide to call an expert, rely upon the above tools to find an expert to trust. A blind call from the yellow pages rarely worked out for us as that is how we found anti-politics guy, still-in-refrigeration-school guy, make-yourself-at-home guy, and sleeping-under-outdoor-running-spigot guy, and the I-swear-your-dog-did-it guy.

My attempts at DIY projects over the years has lead to some very interesting and entertaining stories among friends, especially the near-death ones involved large volts of electricity. But, I have learned a ton, become more confident along the way, and, more importantly, learned my limitations on what I can and cannot tackle.

Some of my buddies can tear down a car engine blindfolded or finish an entire basement with a single hammer. Other guys hire someone to paint a room or change a light bulb. If you are one that just jumps in feet first, do the research first to see if you are going to be over your head. Basically, put the porn down and do a little research. You may save yourself some big bucks with a little DIY knowledge.

Jana’s final thoughts: DIY is not for the faint of heart. It’s tough, it’s complicated and, if you don’t know what you’re doing, it can wind up costing you a ton of money in the end. Before giving DIY a try, follow Jack’s handy tips (see what I did there? Botched SNL reference. Yeah, I know. I’m hilarious) and determine if you really can pull off a DIY project or if you need to call a professional.

One year, one word: Commitment

January 25, 2013 by Jana 15 Comments

Once again, I'm late to a party. This is a chronic problem that I have and, unfortunately, this time I can't blame my husband or my child. I'm the one that's to blame.

The party that I'm talking about is the “pick one word that will define your 2013” party. I first saw it on Money Saving Mom and then, a couple of weeks later, my college friend and blogger extraordinaire, Steph (the proprietess behind Life According to Steph. If you like to laugh, like smart people, and enjoy good writing, visit her site) did the same thing. And since I'm big on stealing good ideas from people I respect, I figured this would be a good thing to do.

Except there's just one problem. In case you haven't noticed, I'm a little wordy. I like to talk and I generally have a lot to say (except about Star Wars and general science fiction. That's a good way to make me go mute). So picking one word proved to be an extremely difficult feat.

And that's why I am late to the party. I couldn't pick a word. Every time I did choose one, I thought of 16 reasons why it wasn't good enough. Which, in it's own weird way, led me to the word I picked for this year. The word?

Commitment.

So why commitment?

I picked this word for several reasons. One, although I am good at keeping obligations to other people, I am terrible at keeping them for myself. If I make an appointment and something my kid or a friend needs, I will cancel in myself, even if it's something I've been looking forward to for a while. I make lots of promises to myself that I never fulfill. And I need to do a better job of staying committed to taking care of myself.

Two, I am terrible with follow through on projects that I start. I mean, I being with good intentions and all the energy and resolve to finish but then…nothing. Life gets in the way and I drop the project faster than I'd drop a loaded gun (provided that safety was on because that could get dangerous). Or, my self-confidence issues get in the way and I delve into all my negative self-talk and wind up talking myself out of whatever it is I was doing regardless of how good my idea might be. I need to learn to wade through that and stay committed to what I start.

Three, commitment shows discipline. It takes a lot of hard work and self-control to stay committed to a plan or idea. I know because I did it once before, when the husband and I were paying down our debt. And I remember how good I felt when I measured our progress and how confident I felt that we stuck to our commitment to get rid of that excess baggage. I need to rediscover that discipline and the way to achieve that is by committing to do it.

And finally, it sets a good example for my daughter. I've talked before (I think) about how much of what I do is to set a good example for her. How can I teach her to honor her commitments if I don't do the same? If she sees Mommy quitting, it's so much easier for her to say “I know that I said I'd do that but I really don't want to. You give up, too, Mommy.” And she'd be telling the truth. I can't have that.

So there you go. Commitment is the word of the year. I've laid out all my goals for the year and I will stay committed to them. In fact, feel free to ask me how they're going if you want to. I could use the extra accountability.

Readers, have you picked a word of the year? If so, what is it?

How to handle someone laughing at your dream

January 23, 2013 by Jana 29 Comments

A few weeks ago, I ran into someone I hadn’t seen in awhile. We did the whole catching up, small talk nonsense which inevitably includes the question “so, what are you up to?”

I responded by letting her know that I’m working from home, teaching part-time, freelancing a bit, and that I started a blogger mentoring program.

At this point, she laughed. Audibly. In my face.

That’s right. This person took an idea that I had and that I am extremely proud of and laughed at it. Needless to say, I was phenomenally pissed. In typical Jana fashion, I did try to defend myself but it was too late. She didn’t care. She had sufficiently cut me down and was done with it. But I wasn’t. Because also in typical Jana fashion, I spent days stewing in how pissed I was.

Then I stopped. And I paused for a moment to reflect on what happened. And I gave myself a little pep talk so I could get over it and move on. Here’s what I said:

Engaging in an argument is futile. I did try to defend my idea. But as I said, she didn’t care. Nothing I explained was going to change her mind. It would have been a waste of time, a waste of breath, and a waste of energy. When someone laughs at you for an idea, no matter how conventional or unconventional, arguing with them isn’t going to get you anywhere. They are not going to come around and see where you’re coming from. They may placate you but they won’t change their opinion. So don’t bother. Instead…
Use it as motivation. Work even harder to show that person that laughing at you was straight up wrong. And then, when you are super successful, you can rub it in. And not allow them to partake in your success. Because it feels so good to prove someone else wrong. Especially someone who doubts you. Or is that just me?
Realize it’s not about you. A person who laughs at someone else’s ideas is usually too scared to venture outside of the norm. Hearing someone else is trying to achieve a dream or start something for scratch is uncomfortable for a lot of people because it highlights their own insecurities and weaknesses. And that? Has nothing to do with you.
Ignore it. This is probably the hardest thing to do. For some reason many of us, myself included, tend to let in the negative while shutting out the positive. Don’t do that. Don’t let it in because that will only make yourself doubt what you’re doing. And you need to be your biggest cheerleader (I’m working really hard on this part). So don’t allow the negativity to sink in.
Don’t doubt yourself. You will have your naysayers. You will have people who make you think like you are an asshole for doing something nontraditional or reaching for your dreams. You will have people that want you to fail. But never, ever let that make you think you can’t do it. Whatever your “it” may be.

I know that this sounds difficult. It is. It took me days to work through everything I needed to in order to feel better. But it worked and now I’m more driven than ever. If for no other reason than to prove to myself that I can turn a negative into a positive. And every time I doubt what I’m doing, I think about that smug little laugh and picture myself slapping her in the face with it.

And then I really feel better.