Sometimes I get:
Frustrated at always being on a budget
Disgusted with my wardrobe
Jealous of people who can travel anywhere, anytime, free from obligations, money worries, or any other constraint
Annoyed that my house is never as clean as I’d like it to be
Angry that I had a miscarriage and even angrier that it’s so damn hard for me to get pregnant
Overwhelmed at all the adulting I need to do every day
Tired of making choices and decisions
Hangry
Sad about past hurts and angry at how they’ve changed me
Irked with myself for not having enough hustle and discipline
Wistful for all the books I’ll never get around to reading and the places I’ll never get around to visiting no matter how hard I try
Disappointed with myself
Unnecessarily irritated by bad grammar, poor manners, and terrible driving
Caught up in comparing myself to other people
Embarrassed to have people in my home
Homesick for New York even though it’s been almost 20 years since I lived there
Lonely
Discouraged with blogging and writing
Irrationally enraged at small things like chipped nail polish, zippers that won’t close properly, stains that appear on my clothes after they’ve gone through the wash, and pens with light ink
Distracted from what’s important
I don’t deny myself feeling any of these. I think it’s normal to feel any or all of these at some point and if you say you don’t ever feel any of them, or something not so wonderful that’s not on the list, I don’t know that I believe you. No one feels 100% happy and perfect all the time. If you do, you need to share your secrets. Honestly. You can make 80 billion dollars off of that.
It’s important to me to own my emotions, whatever they might be, and deal with them. And after I deal with them, it makes me realize that my life isn’t really that bad and I get over myself and move on (except being appalled by poor grammar, bad manners, and terrible driving. And laundry stains. Seriously. Why are stains appearing on my clothes after they’ve been washed?)
Because while I’m spending time and energy focusing on all the things that are wrong, it’s time and energy I’m taking away from focusing on what’s right.