Jana Says

Friday Six-Pack: And now it’s October

October 7, 2016 by Jana 17 Comments

And now it’s October. Things are getting crazy busy, mostly in a good way, and I’m super excited for the fall weather and yoga pants and hoodies and I’m hoping to get in at least one more beach visit before it’s too cold so I can clear my head and regroup and actually get shit done this winter.

So let’s check in with the goings on from this first week in October: Friday Six Pack

- Had to let a few books go and only picked up one more from the library, The Couple Next Door, but I did finish 2: Adulting: How to Become a Grown-Up in 468 Easy(ish) Steps (this one is for my adulting starter kit project) and Heartbreaker: Stories (book of short stories). Both will be reviewed on Tuesday for Show Us Your Books‘ very special 2 year anniversary edition. We have giveaways to say thank you for 2 amazing bookish years! And apropos of nothing, here’s this funny:
- Only new show I’m watching this year is Designated Survivor. I’m quite enjoying it thus far.
- Did you guys know you could make phone calls for free using FB Messenger?! I had absolutely no idea this was an option until the other day. I’m irrationally and inexplicably overexcited about knowing this.
- Planning travel is something that is both stressful and exciting. Since we’re headed towards the end of the year, that means it’s time to start thinking about all the places I want to go next year and also where my budget will allow. Suffice it to say, they are not in agreement and they need to be because I turn 40 next year and some serious travel needs to happen to celebrate. Definitely on the list: Dallas and Orlando (the former for a conference, the latter for cheerleading provided the girls get a bid which I’m 100% confident they will because they’re that good except I’m not allowed to give proof or I have to go to cheer jail and trust when I say I don’t want that). Possibilities: London, Alaskan cruise, the Bahamas, and Myrtle Beach. If you’ve visited any or all of these, what do you recommend? And I know some of you are either from Dallas or frequently go there so what should I keep on my radar for next year?
- Confession: I did not watch the VP debate. Not only could I not stomach the thought of it, baseball playoffs were happening. The Orioles lost, by the way. So did my Mets. I now give zero fucks about the postseason with the caveat that I am rooting for the Cubs because 107 years is way too long of a drought. Hell, the Jews didn’t even wander the desert that long and we were LOST.
- I have been on a huge 90s music kick this week, most notably 311, Live, and Jimmy Eat World. I also found my old iPod and discovered some songs I forgot I love, like this one from Better Than Ezra (it’s actually particularly poignant this month, given the fact that it’s Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day on October 15th. I will most likely not write about this again since it’s too painful but will rerun my post from last year) Fun fact: their song “Cry in the Sun” is one of my top 5 all time favorite songs.

Ending the week with a visit with my grandmother and the child’s BFF’s birthday party, hopefully neither of which is ruined by remnants of Matthew. Hope all my Florida friends (and anyone else affected) are safe! See you guys on Tuesday for Show Us Your Books!

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I can’t but I can

October 4, 2016 by Jana 31 Comments

I don’t know if the confessions linkup is still a thing and I don’t generally participate because I am terrible remembering to do it and also I don’t usually post on Wednesdays but I haven’t done any sort of confession lately (unless you count me listing all the jobs I’d suck at) and I saw Stephanie write this post (thanks for the idea) and thought hey! I should do that.

So I did.

I cannot whistle or snap my fingers…but I can tie a knot in a cherry stem with my tongue

I cannot name all the US presidents in order…but I can name all 7 dwarfs and all the Fraggles

I cannot remember what I need to buy in a store…but I can remember song lyrics from 1987

I cannot do a smoky eye…but I can rock red lip gloss

I cannot navigate anywhere without a map…but I can find my way back when I inevitably do get lost

I cannot do math in my head…but I can correct your grammar

I cannot run a marathon…but I can read a 500 page book in a day

I cannot travel everywhere I want to go…but I can prioritize and visit those places

I cannot make small talk one on one…but I can speak in front of a room full of people

I cannot remember where I put my phone…but I can remember details of people’s lives

I cannot easily ask for help…but I can figure it out on my own

I cannot erase my depression…but I can fight like hell to keep it in check

I cannot make images…but I can find hilarious shit like this:

oscar What can or can’t you guys do?

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Friday six-pack: San Diego aftermath

September 30, 2016 by Jana 18 Comments

Friday Six Pack

This week is a 9 pack. I blame it on jetlag.

- I have not fully recovered from my time in San Diego. I mean, I had a kick ass amazing time in a beautiful city with some of my favorite people on the planet but my internal clock is still all kinds of screwy. I’m still not 100% sure what day of the week it is and I know I need more sleep. But every day and night I spent out there was worth feeling this way.
- My keys got locked in my car on Monday night. Did not realize it until I went to take my daughter to school on Tuesday. Had to call my husband to free the keys. Didn’t know what excuse to write on the late student sign-in sheet so I wrote “adulting fail”. Pretty sure I’m going to get a letter about that. Don’t even care.
- I read two great books on the plane ride to San Diego, Monster and Lady Cop Makes Trouble, and on the way home, I tried to read The Woman in Cabin 10. Let’s just say that if Steph and I weren’t discussing it for The Armchair Librarians, it would have been returned to sender tout de suite. I hate it and it’s killing my reading vibe.
- As per usual, my mind is a busy place and even moreso this week. I’m aching for a quiet place to work through my thoughts and a mid-week beach trip was in order. The rain, however, was a huge obstacle in making that dream come true. Seriously. Stop fucking raining.
- I had a conversation with someone in San Diego about the show Orphan Black. He recommended it highly and since the chick who stars in it just won the Emmy, I figured I’d give it a try. And you know? It’s right up my fucked up, murdery alley. I’m not digging the whole weird science fiction element but it’s more in the same vein as Stranger Things or Dark Matter (the book) so I can overlook it when it gets too weird for me to handle.
- Speaking of fucked up and murdery, did you see the Buzzfeed post about true crime podcasts? I’m pleased to say that I listen to several of them already. ALL THE TRUE CRIME!!!
- The debate: I just cannot comment on it. Everything about it ignited a horror that renders me speechless and incoherent. It was one of the most disgusting displays of mansplaining, disrespect, arrogance, bullying, and sheer dickishness I have ever been unfortunate enough to watch. He bulldozed over Hillary and Lester, and showed absolutely no regard for the rules of debate or even common courtesy. The only thing that orange asshole proved is that not only is he unfit to be president, he’s unfit to be a basic human being. Like, it’s an impossibility. Is this the person we want as the face of our country? HELL NO. And I can’t even begin to imagine what will happen if he somehow, through some rip in the time/space continuum, is elected. I’m genuinely terrified. How people can continue to defend him absolutely escapes me. Plus, he’s a fucking liar who lies. I hate liars.
- South Carolina: Every day my child is dropped off at school, this is precisely what I panic about. My heart breaks and aches for those parents and those children and what happened to that teenager to make him think shooting up a school of babies would make it better? Oh, wait. AND WE STILL DON’T HAVE PRACTICAL GUN LAWS?! What the fuck is it going to take?
- I might have shared this song already but it’s definitely my anthem lately:

This weekend will involve cheer practice, naps, books, and general sorts of nothingness.

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Through the Years, 1950s style: A Jana and Erin playlist

September 29, 2016 by Jana 8 Comments

This entry is part 7 of 8 in the series Playlists

Last Thursday of the month means it’s time for another playlist with Jana and Erin – a playlist with a twist. Not “The” Twist because that song was released in the ’60s, so that doesn’t make the cut. Yet.

The 1950s. A time for poodle skirts, sock hops, and soda fountains. Also McCarthyism, the Cold War, and Jim Crow but that’s the part that sucked so we’re not going to talk about that today. Nope. Instead, we’re going to talk about one of the fun parts of the 1950s–the music!

I (Jana) love 50s music. It melts my dark, hard rock loving heart. It’s fun and catchy and not at all like anything we have now. When I need a pick-me-up, I’ll put on one of my 50s Spotify playlists. It makes me happy. Probably has to do with childhood memories of listening to the music at bar mitzvahs or with my grandparents. But who knows? I just like it. #noshame Hope you guys like some of the songs, too!

This is also the beginning of our through the decades playlist series (think of this as the Time Life version of our playlist series. Anyone else remember the Time Life CD collections? No? Just me?) and thanks to Erin for indulging me in this decade first.

Songs from “The Day the Music Died” artists: Sadly, all three of the following artists died in a plane crash in Iowa in February 1959.

Come On, Let’s Go by Ritchie Valens (1958): This video clip is fun, even if the person who uploaded it misspelled the artist’s name.

Chantilly Lace by The Big Bopper (1958): “Hellllooooo baaaaaby!”

Not Fade Away by Buddy Holly (1957): Jana is a big fan of this bespectacled musician’s songs. He appears in our playlists from time to time. (Jana’s note: I’m pretty sure this is at least his 3rd mention)

Songs from piano men:

Tutti Frutti by Little Richard (1955):

Whole Lotta Shakin’ Goin’ On by Jerry Lee Lewis (1957): Let’s forget about that whole marrying his teenage cousin part of the story. (Jana’s note: Did anyone else see Great Balls of Fire? Wasn’t Dennis Quaid pretty great in that?)

Songs by brothers:

Shout by The Isley Brothers (1959): The dance scene in Animal House with John Belushi in a toga is one of those iconic cinematic scenes where the perfect song was picked for a movie. But, that’s not this video clip because that was Otis Day and the Knights covering The Isley Brothers.

Bye Bye Love by The Everly Brothers (1957): fun fact~the daughter of one of these guys is named Erin Everly and that’s who inspired Axl Rose to write the lyrics for Sweet Child of Mine. (Jana’s note: I did not know that)

Songs that make you want to dance (besides the ones already mentioned):

Shake, Rattle, and Roll by Bill Haley and the Comets (1954):

At the Hop by Danny & the Juniors (1957)

Johnny B. Goode by Chuck Berry: Since we forgot about Jerry Lee Lewis marrying his cousin, let’s forget that Chuck Berry allegedly had cameras installed in the women’s toilets filming them while using the restroom at a restaurant he owned… (Jana’s note: I did not know this either. But seriously, what the actual fuck?)

Love Me Tender by Elvis Presley (1956): For that slow dance…

Songs that were introduced to me (Erin) by my grandfather:

Your Cheatin’ Heart by Hank Williams (1953):

It’s Only Make Believe by Conway Twitty (1958): Sometime, in the ’70s, my (Erin’s) grandparents and extended family went to a Conway Twitty show, and Dolly Parton was the opening act. My uncle bought me nachos, and I was sitting on his lap eating them. Then, I puked all over his boots while Conway Twitty was playing. Awww sweet memories.

Folsom Prison Blues by Johnny Cash (1955): Johnny sings “I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die.” Johnny was gansta before gangsta rappers.

But, what’s great, is songs like these have lasted SIXTY years. Think about that. What songs recorded this decade do you think will last as long as these? What artists will the bloggers of 2076 be sharing?

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No regrets

September 27, 2016 by Jana 14 Comments

Let’s talk regret. I’m not talking the “I should not have watched that 10th consecutive episode of Sons of Anarchy last night” or “potato chips and Diet Coke for lunch was a bad idea” or “I regret wearing this dress on a boat because this shit is inappropriate” types of regret. (For the record, I’ve done all of these). I’m talking the serious type of regret.

The life altering types of regret.

The not taking the job type of regret.

The staying home rather than go on that once in a lifetime trip type of regret.

The staying in a relationship that doesn’t make you happy for longer than you should type of regret.

The not taking a chance on something, anything, because you were scared type of regret.

It also works in reverse. You know those “I can’t believe I did that” type stuff.

Regret is a real, powerful emotion. It makes you think and do weird stuff. It can ruin your day, your week, your year.

I gave up on regret at some point in my 20s. I’d love to tell you that there was this big eye opening moment but there wasn’t. It was simply some self-reflection that made me realize regret, for me, was a fucking waste of time. I can’t change the decision I made, and I made the decision I did because clearly at the time, it was right for me. Would others have done the same? Probably not. But they’re not me. They don’t have to live with my choices.

I do.

And I think that’s the crux of my no regrets philosophy. If I’m comfortable with the choice I made, I’m not bothered or saddened or guilty or shamed by it. I don’t feel the need to erase anything or wish I’d done this or that different. I don’t regret relationships or jobs or making that purchase or taking that 3 hour nap because every single choice has led me to where I am now. Everything has taught me a lesson. What I like, who I like, what I want. Regretting any of those parts of my life means denying something’s impact.

Have I done stupid things that maybe I shouldn’t have? Yes. Absolutely, 100% YES. But do I regret them? No. Absolutely not. And believe me, I’m grateful nothing terrible happened as a result of those god-awful choices. Because some of them could have gone incredibly awry.

Also, in dealing with depression and anxiety, having regret is simply stoking the fire. It opens up avenues to dwell and beat myself up and that’s a gateway to an episode. I don’t need anything else making it worse. Especially not something I can control.

Let’s be clear: regret is multifaceted. The regret I’m talking here is based on choices or perceived loss of opportunity, not on time (think time spent with grandparents or kids). And you should never, ever do anything you’re not comfortable with because you think you might regret if you don’t. That’s just ridiculous. And pop psychology will lead you to believe that you should do those things simply because you don’t want a lifetime of regrets. That’s a steaming pile of shit.

You’re an adult. You do what you want.

And live without regret for doing so.

live-without-regret

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Friday Six-Pack: And now it’s October

I can’t but I can

Friday six-pack: San Diego aftermath

Through the Years, 1950s style: A Jana and Erin playlist

No regrets

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