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Hey, boss! You suck.

October 15, 2012 by Jana 8 Comments

So I have this friend Ryan. And he has a blog. And he writes good stuff. I even guest posted for him! And he's a mentor for Bloggers Helping Bloggers and, in general, just a pretty cool dude. But last week, he posed a question to his fellow Gen Y persons and because I'm technically not Gen Y (I mean, I could be depending on which measure you use but most of them put me at the tail end of Gen X), I couldn't respond to the survey.

So I'm responding in a post. Because it's a topic I feel strongly about and also, I don't like to feel left out (age discrimation is not cool, Ryan).

The gist of the survey was this: he wanted people to describe characteristics of a good and bad boss. Or, why did you leave a job? I feel that, having left multiple jobs over the years, I am an expert. And, despite the sentiment that most people leave a job because of their boss, I only did this once. I usually left because of pay or other reasons, but there was one instance–at the best job I had, sadly enough–where my boss was so unbearable I swore I would never again sell my soul for a paycheck.

What made her so bad? Well, the red flags were there during the interview and hiring process but I figured I could get over that. Little did I know that it would get worse. For instance:

This would have been helpful

Her moods. Moodiest. Woman. Ever. With this woman, you never knew what you were going to get. And that wasn't just day to day, it was hour to hour. I have never seen someone's moods change so quickly. And so often. I get that we all have our moments and that not every day is sparkles and unicorns. But when you are in charge of people, you need to have consistency. Your staff needs to know what they're getting. Changing your mood on a dime is not a great characteristic of a good leader. It sets a bad tone for morale.

Withholding information. In what I can only assume was a power play, she never gave anyone complete information. When your work is consistently a team effort, each person needs to know what's going on. She would never meet wight the teams as a whole; rather, she would meet individually so then, when we talked to each other, we'd all be confused. And look stupid. She was especially good at doing this prior to meetings with outside agencies. Then she could look like the superhero and come to our aid because we were just the dumb worker bees and she was the smart, informed head of the hive. Not giving your workers all the information they need to do their work so you can look good is a slap in the face to productivity.

Refusing to make decisions. She never made a concrete decision. Ever. And if she did, she refused to put it in writing. She did this so that if something did get screwed up, she couldn't be held accountable. She could just say “I didn't make that decision” or “you're remembering my words wrong”. Again, this was an attempt to always make herself look good at her staff's expense. When you are a leader, you need to make decisions and own up to them, good outcome or bad. That's why you're the boss. Not just to guide your stuff but to make those executive decisions. Failing to do so makes everyone question your leadership ability.

Lack of availability. I get that, as a supervisor, you have many, many meetings. With high level people, outside agencies and your staff. That's fine. In fact, it's more than fine. It's just part of your job. But this supervisor would disappear for hours on end, didn't respond to emails, had no cell phone, and insisted on not maintaining her calendar. This made her completely inaccessible to your staff (and her supervisor, but that's a different topic entirely), which made her an ineffective leader. Your staff needs to have access to you to discuss issues, information, and details. When you disappear and your staff needs you to finish a project, work gets held up. Not good for productivity.

Leading with fear, not respect. This particular supervisor was one of the most vindictive people I have ever encountered. If you disagreed with her, either in private or in public, she would make sure that you were punished. She would exclude you from big, high profile projects, critique your work with overly painstaking scrutiny, or basically find ways to embarrass you. She was rude, a bully, and often ignored common social decencies like saying “hello”. She threatened people to get what she wanted and fear of her sanctions was so high, people did whatever she wanted just to avoid them. But no one respected anything she did. You can't be a good leader if you don't earn any respect. And good people will leave.

No supervisor is perfect and many exhibit one or more of the characteristics. Sometimes on their own, sometimes together. That's fine. We all have our bad days and low moments. It's almost expected. But someone acts like this all day, every day, and that person is your supervisor, it makes for a hostile work environment. And low morale. And general unpleasantness.

If you are in a position of authority at work, don't abuse it. Treat your staff like they are capable, intelligent people. Don't demoralize them. Help them the best you can. Praise them when they do good work; don't just save your feedback for something wrong. Most people don't enjoy going to work. It's even worse when their supervisor is an asshat.

Don't be an asshat.

 

Filed Under: work

Using illness as a productivity tool

October 12, 2012 by Jana 5 Comments

Last week, I was a victim. The victim of an inflamed trachea. And yes, it is as delightful as it sounds.

Besides talking like Joan Rivers for a week, I had a fever, pounding headache, and an exhaustion that meant I was sleeping about 15 hours a day. I missed a multitude of events I was looking forward to, including a Zumbathon for breast cancer awareness month and I’ve never been so glad to have queue of posts. It was a waste of week, which pisses me off.

With so many projects I want to start, work on, and/or finish, having a week where I do almost nothing makes me anxious. That feeling of slipping even farther behind is uncomfortable and I’m not good when I’m idle. I can’t even watch TV without doing something else (well, most TV. There are about 3 shows that get my undivided attention). In case I’m being vague, I cannot stand feeling unproductive. I like knowing that at the end of the day, I’ve accomplished all that was possible that day.

So when I’m sick and unable to do anything but sleep, I can’t really get much done. Or can’t I? Why did I allow myself to think that being sick is an excuse to do nothing but lay like a lump on my couch or bed? I mean, it’s not like I had some horrible illness like mono or pneumonia. I had a broken voice and a fever (in my defense, a fever renders me pretty motionless. I cannot handle a fever). This should not have rendered me completely helpless. For instance, during my waking hours, I could have:

  • Worked on my freelancing career. I have a ridiculous stack of books on my nightstand and on my Kindle app waiting to be read. I’m slowly working my way through them (I did just finish R.A. Dickey’s memoir and I’m currently reading Tony Danza’s book, I’d Like To Apologize to Every Teacher I’ve Ever Had. Don’t laugh at me. It’s actually quite good). But I could have read more, particularly some of the career and freelancing books I have waiting. Even though I wasn’t writing or networking, I could have been working on my career.
  • Organized my recipe binder. For Christmas, my well meaning mother-in-law bought me a subscription to Southern Living. While I don’t exactly fit the description of a southern anything, the recipes in the magazine are pretty good. So each month, I rip out the ones I want to try and throw them in my recipe binder. After two years of this, my binder is a disorganized mess. Being stuck on the couch was the perfect time to organize and sort the recipes, in addition to creating some menu plans that incorporate the recipes.
  • Caught up on blogs. I am desperately behind on my blog reading. The harder I try to get caught up, the worse it gets. Instead of doing nothing, I could have very easily brought my laptop into my bed and spent some time reading, commenting, tweeting and sharing on Facebook. I know I would have been entertained and I wouldn’t have felt so disconnected from my blogging peers and friends.
  • Uploaded music. I have a bunch of CDs that I need to upload into my iTunes. I’m particularly lazy and good at avoiding this project, mainly because it’s time consuming and annoying. But it needs to get done. I probably could have mustered the energy to collect what CDs I could find and sit on my couch and upload them. I could have done this while rewatching the entire series of Prison Break or one of the new to me series I’m dying to watch on Netflix.

Looking back on it, I am upset that I wasted so much time doing…well, nothing. I played PopWords, read Cracked for hours and stared blankly at whatever crap is on daytime TV. I know that it’s okay to give myself a break when I’m sick. But with time as a finite resource, I can’t stand the feeling that I’ve wasted some of it.

What do you do when you’re sick? Do you try to be productive or do you just wallow in it? Join the discussion on Facebook or comment below.

 

Filed Under: work

Handling post-conference information overload

September 10, 2012 by Jana 6 Comments

If you follow me on Twitter, you know I spent most of last week at FinCon (the Financial Blogger Conference for all of my non-blogger readers. Also, if you don't follow me on Twitter, I highly recommend it. We have a good time over there). You may also know that fact because I mentioned it about 3 or 4 times on DMS. And I'm fairly certain you all have the same question–how was it? (Unless you were there and know it was great and in that case, you probably want to know how my liver is feeling. I asked her and she said fine as long as I stay away from red wine for a few days).

In short, FinCon was amazing. But most of you probably don't really care. And that's absolutely fine. Because if this weren't my site and I wasn't a blogger, I wouldn't care either. However, at one point or another, we all experience something like I did at FinCon.

Information overload.

When you attend a conference, workshop, class or any other educational medium, you typically walk away with more information than you can handle. At least I do (if you don't, I am incredibly jealous). I also walk away wanting to implement everything I learned. And I want to do it NOW!!! But that is completely unreasonable and ridiculous and is probably due to the lack of sleep (and aforementioned red wine).

To deal with my overambitiousness, I developed a strategy. I wish it had a cool name but it doesn't so I'll just tell you what I do to manage the massive influx of information that assembles in my brain after a really intense conference:

Sleep

At conferences where wine and amazing company and educational breakout sessions are aplenty, sleep is in short supply. That lack of sleep can impact the post-conference goals you set. It is essential that you're well rested when you do this otherwise you might decide that perhaps you want to become a biker and then sign up for motorcycle lessons because you think bikers are awesome especially when they look like ZZ Top and then you buy a motorcycle from Craigslist only now you have no where to put it and then you remember that you are terrified of motorcycles and men with long beards. So now you're out money on a motorcycle and maybe a leather jacket and the next 4 Saturdays are booked because you need to attend motorcycle riding classes.

This is not cool. However, if you were well rested, you probably would have just decided to write an ebook or look for a freelance gig. Something simple and more aligned with your actual life goals (unless one of your goals is to become a biker. If that's the case, have at it. No judging here).

Cull business cards

At conferences, business cards are given out more freely than beads on Mardi Gras. And you don't even have to show your boobs to get them. All you have to do is engage in a 5 minute conversation about even the most mundane topics like cookies and you will obtain a card. You wind up returning with a massive collection of cards from people you can't remember. It's overwhelming.

To manage it, sit down with the pile of cards and slowly go through them. Much like they suggest on Hoarders, create 3 piles: keep, toss, I'm not sure. Throw away any cards that you took simply to be polite, are from companies you don't care to have a relationship with, or bloggers with whom you didn't or don't want to forge a connection (don't get mad. It happens. I'm pretty sure my card is in many a landfill). Keep the ones that you know you need. For the “I don't knows”, take some time to browse the website. See if it could be a good fit. File the cards away and set a reminder to go through them again in 2 months. Gauge your interaction with those people and make a determination then.

Make implementation lists

Conferences often leave us with a post-conference high. Included in that is the feeling of empowerment, an incredible belief in our skills and abilities, a desire to enthusiastically pursue our goals, and a burning desire to be next year's success story. On the one hand, this is great. It's good to feel ambitious and confident and ready to take on the world with lack of abandon.

On the other hand, it's a disaster. We try so hard to implement all the ideas, tips and tricks we learned that we end up doing a really crappy job on all of it. Then we get pissed and dejected and all that confidence? Gone. The post-conference high deflates like a bad breast implant. To prevent that from happening, go through your notes and make lists. Figure out what can be implemented immediately, like adding a plugin or signing up for a service or sending a follow up email. Then determine when the other changes will roll out and what's a reasonable schedule for that. Maybe in 3 months you'll have a site redesign, in 6 months you'll have a newsletter and in a year, you'll publish that ebook. Taking your time doesn't mean you gained little at the conference; it means you did learn and you want to do the best you can.

Reread notes at a later date

Whether you take handwritten or electronic notes (I take notes by hand because I am old and I write faster than I type on an iPad), you will leave with a cache of information, including handouts, website lists and other “extras”. When combined with the sessions themselves, there is often so much that my brain cannot handle it all. So, when you return, put it all away. Don't look at it. Let your brain relax and decompress. I do this by watching some of the worst TV I can find. I recommend this but you can do whatever works for you.

By letting the brain take a vacation, much of the conference noise gets cleared. That way, when you reread your notes a few days later, you are more focused and can process them rationally, clearly, and intelligently. They make more sense. Retaining the information is easier, which then makes thenimplementation strategies more effective and logical.

FinCon is probably the best conference I have ever been to, and not just because of free wine, food, friends and the occassional bit of eye candy (yes, boys, we do look at you and talk about you that way). FinCon has helped me improve as a blogger, writer, site owner and member of the personal finance community. My strategy for dealing with what I learn at FinCon has helped me maintain my blogging sanity so the other parts of my sanity (which are dwindling) stick around.

Readers, how do you handle processing post-conference information?

 

Filed Under: bloggers, work, writing

I did something big

July 9, 2012 by Jana 38 Comments

someecards.com - The next best thing to quitting my job is fantasizing about quitting my job.

Last week, I did something I never thought I’d do. I quit my job.

Let me explain why.

To say that my job didn’t contribute to my mental health issues would be a lie. Why? Because for the last 10 years, I have seen nothing but some of the worst humanity has to offer. After a while, it starts to take its toll on you. Not only that, I started to realize I could no longer function in such a rigid environment as a government job demands. It’s just not for me, and it was starting to bleed over into other parts of my life. Which really is not good.

So, despite the fact that not every aspect of the job was horrible, I did what I needed to do and let it go.

Before I made the decision, I analyzed every single possible consequence. After waffling back and forth for weeks, engaging in ridiculously long conversations with my husband and therapist, and staying awake many nights stressing about whether or not this was the right thing to do, I came to 4 conclusions that led to my decision. These conclusions solidified that I was making the right choice, and I bit the bullet and resigned my position.

I’ll admit that everyone has a different thought process and what I used to make my decision might not be what someone else would use. But it worked for me, and I thought I’d let you in on what goes through my head in times of big, life altering decisions. These were my guiding principles:

Finances

This where I was most stressed. After years of paying down debt, my husband and I were finally in a position to start catching up, getting ahead, and having a bit of fun with our money. Losing my salary would mean going back to living on a tight budget, watching our frivolous expenditures, and perhaps putting off or readjusting our goals for certain things (like buying a new house). But there were two elements we were overlooking: we had enough to meet all of our necessities just with his salary and in the long run, happiness means more than money (provided our basic needs were met). Yes, it’s going to be a tough adjustment but one that we were both willing to make. It helps that I have a stable part time job that will fill in a lot of the gaps.

We also realized, probably for the first time, just what having no consumer debt means. It means options. And options? Are nice.

Support system

I’m not really one who cares what strangers think of me and my choices. However, I do care deeply about what my family and friends think. It’s not so much that I want them to agree with me; I just want them to support me, even if they believe what I’m doing is horribly stupid. In this respect, I am so fortunate. I have an amazing support system. Everyone I talked to encouraged me to do what I thought was best for me and my family, and many of them even believe I have the ability to make a living doing what I want to do (and have wanted to do my entire life). I would not have had the courage to go through with leaving my nice, secure job if I didn’t have a virtual army of friends and family in my corner. These are the people I know I can cry to, brag to, and lay out all of my rampant insecurities and they’ll be there, picking me up, cheering for me, and celebrating along with me.

This is just as important as having your finances in order.

Short and long term goals

I couldn’t start this new part of my life without any goals. I didn’t want to spend the next few years floundering about, trying to figure out what to do next. Fortunately, I left my job with a purpose. And that purpose is to try to make a living as…a writer. It’s all I’ve ever wanted to do, and in order to make it happen, I had to set both short and long term goals. So I did that. I mapped out exactly what I want to see happen in the next month, six months, year, and three years. Not only that, but I have been conducting painstaking research on getting a book published (you know, since I’m writing a book), setting metrics goals for DMS, establishing a writing schedule, and pretty much organizing myself as much as possible so that I can begin working on my goals.

Goals are crucial to me. They give me a something to work towards and since I hate failing, they push me to work even harder. That is not to say my goals are set in stone. They evolve as I evolve and sometimes, I even change my mind. But I always have goals.

No regrets

In my 35 years, there are only a handful of choices that I regret. And while I try not to focus on that regret and instead try to focus on what I’ve gained by not making those choices, I can’t help but wonder what my life would be like if I had made those other choices (kind of like the whole Sliding Doors concept). I didn’t want a career as a writer to fall into the “what if” category. I need to know if I can do it. And if I can’t, and it needs to remain a hobby, at least I know. But at least I can say that I tried. And I’d rather have tried and failed than spend the rest of my life regretting that I never bothered to try.

What now?

I’m terrified of this next phase of my life. Like really, really terrified. I’m not good at self-promotion and I get writer’s block. I’m scared that we’re not going to be able to pay our bills. I’m petrified that I’ll never find a job or make a dime as a writer. I have insomnia from worrying that people hate my writing and will never want to read a word I write, which really makes this whole venture pretty futile. But I know that my fears are normal (well, most of them). I know, and hope, that they’re temporary. It’s never easy doing what you feel called to do and trying to live the life you believe you’re meant to instead of the life you’re told is the right one.

But I’ve never been good at being normal. Why start now?

Filed Under: random, work, writing

No spend summary OR Where the f@ck did May go?

June 1, 2012 by Jana 7 Comments

At the beginning of the month, I issued a challenge to myself not to spend any unplanned money. I did it as a way to get my frivolous spending back in check, be more mindful of what I was spending my money on and as a way to gain some small bit of control over my life. Nothing too crazy. And it worked too.

I’m pleased to say that overall, I accomplished my goals. I definitely have a better handle on my spending, and I’m proud to say that I spent onky $10 that was unplanned. I bought myself lunch one day and then I bought my daughter and I drinks from Starbucks (iced green tea for me, milk for her). That was it. When I needed to, I found items in the dark recesses of my closets or pantry that I had forgotten about. Some days, that prevented me from having to buy anything. It’s pretty amazing what you can find to eat, wear, do, etc. when you’re actively avoiding spending money. (Let’s also say that my love of Pandora radio has increased exponentially this month. I heart that app.)

That’s not to say I went through the entire month without spending any money. That would be almost impossible. I’ll answer the question I know you’re dying to ask–what did I buy? To start, I did buy a few apps for my iPad and a few new songs but since I had the iTunes gift card, that was no money out of my pocket. I bought some shorts and t-shirts but that was kept to the clothing budget. As far as my weakness areas, bought exactly zero books for myself (though I did get quite a few from the library) and zero makeup or nail polish (although I did get a pedicure that had been budgeted for prior to this little experiment).

I also spent some money on website stuff. Not Daily Money Shot but on two other projects I’m working on. I had Andrea from Nuts and Bolts Media design one site and she and I are working together to design the second one. I’m not quite ready to share the details of them yet but let’s just say the former is nothing like anything I’ve ever done before and the latter is going to be a compilation of all the sites I’ve started over the years, along with some fresh, new material. I need an outlet to talk about other things besides money and these sites should accomplish that.

I think that’s pretty much it. I didn’t go out a whole lot this month, except to the SITS Girls Bloggy Boot Camp (paid for months ago) and to Annapolis to meet one of my blogging heroes, The Bloggess (the event was free!) so that helped. It’s easy not to spend money when you don’t go anywhere. I’ve also noticed that, since I’ve been home, it’s easy to avoid the temptation to purchase unnecessary crap. Sure it’s fun to browse different websites and look at all kinds of fun stuff to buy, but since my computer and my wallet are in different prts of the house, and I’m typically too lazy to walk downstairs (hell, half the time I’m too lazy to walk 6 feet to the bathroom until I absolutely have to), I don’t buy what I see. Then when my wallet and computer are in the same room, I can’t remember what I as looking at (I don’t bookmark things that I want). So it’s a win-win.

I’m glad that I did this. I’m much more mindful of my money and I’ve found so much stuff I forgot I had, it’s like I went on a shopping spree. But I just have one question–what the hell happened to May? How is it over already?

 

Filed Under: Money, work

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Jana

I'm Jana ...

A book reading, nail polish wearing, binge watching, music loving, dog owning, reluctant cheer mom.
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