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Give me back my Thanksgiving!

November 10, 2011 by Jana 24 Comments

Dear Retailers,

I am not pleased with you. You have taken the Christmas creep way too far. In fact, it is no longer a creep. It is a hijacking.

Let me tell you a little story:

I was going through my Tuesday night routine of watching Glee and folding laundry, happy as could be that my daughter was asleep (well, in bed and quiet), my dogs were not barking and I had the house to myself. I was particularly happy because this was the first episode that featured one of the winners ofThe Glee Project (don’t judge me) AND he had just sang “It Isn’t Easy Being Green” (have I mentioned that I am a fan obsessed with The Muppets? No? I need to address that at some point). Then. It happened.

A freaking Christmas commercial came on! I am not kidding. It was a Christmas commercial from WalMart, and gender stereotypes aside, it was horrific. Halloween just ended not 24 hours before and you’re paying for Christmas advertising?! It’s an atrocity on so many levels. You’ve committed so many offenses from this it’s hard to pick just one. And that is that you’ve now stolen my Thanksgiving.

Yup. I said it. You’ve stolen Thanksgiving from me. And I want it back. In case you’re forgetting what Thanksgiving is—since that’s what you’ve clearly demonstrated based on your advertising and in-store displays—let me remind you that it’s the time of year we’re supposed to sanitize the relationship between the Native Americans and the Pilgrims and celebrate them coming together over turkeys and cornucopias. But it’s more than that. November is supposed to be the time between Halloween and Christmas (and Hanukkah) where we take a moment to actually enjoy our lives and attempt to be thankful for what we have. Which you have now made impossible by assailing us with your nonstop advertising for Black Friday deals and Christmas sales.

You have now made Thanksgiving the gateway holiday to Black Friday. Thanksgiving used to be a holiday unto itself. We would learn the story of Thanksgiving, classrooms would be full of traditional, handmade Thanksgiving projects, and relish in the fact that we got two days off (I still do this, actually). Sadly, Thanksgiving is now lost in the shuffle of its very expensive cousin–Black Friday. No longer do we hear about the wonderfulness of Thanksgiving. Now we are bombarded with Black Friday deals instead. Retailers are rushing us past a day of turkey and stuffing in order to ensure that we’re all aware of their midnight shopping specials. Thanksgiving is now something we need to get through in order to shop.

And how dare you remove all Thanksgiving décor from your stores? It is impossible to walk into a store and find anything even remotely related to Thanksgiving. For years, I have been looking for Thanksgiving decorations–which used to appear in abundance when I was a kid–to put around my house. Now? I can’t find one unless it’s some hideous turkey that looks like it belongs in a horror movie instead of my living room. I want to decorate my house, not scare my pets.

I know, by now you’re thinking that you’re not entirely to blame for hijacking my Thanksgiving. You’re right. TV and radio do hold their share of accountability. Not only because they accept your advertising dollars but because they too have bought (literally) into the Christmas creep. Imagine my disappointment when The Grinch Who Stole Christmas was running on November 5th? Really, November 5th? What’s next—showing A Christmas Story on Veteran’s Day? And please don’t get me started on the radio stations that are playing Christmas music 24/7 starting the day after Thanksgiving (in fact, where  I live, I think some might have started that already).

But mainly, retailers, I blame you. You have stolen Thanksgiving from me and everyone else. I do understand that you may be wondering where my anger towards you is coming from. After all, I should understand that you’re just business trying to make money in a depressed economy, right? Wrong. I think that’s bullshit. And I’ve been patient with you up until now. But I’m done.

I want my Thanksgiving back! And if you can’t help me, I’ll make it happen myself.  I may not be artistic or creative but I can outline my hand on construction paper, glue feathers to it and make a turkey. I can still have my delicious Thanksgiving dinner with my family, even if the dinner doesn’t look like a photo shoot (Martha Stewart, I blame you for this phenomenon). I will refuse to go shopping on Black Friday and Cyber Monday, and even refuse to discuss or promote your sales. I will find a picture of a cornucopia to hang on my wall (thank you, Internet).

You can try to hide Thanksgiving from me. But like a bloodhound, I’ll sniff it out, find it, and bring it back.

Just try to stop me.

 

 

 

 

 

Filed Under: random, shopping Tagged With: holidays

What downward dog taught me about money

November 9, 2011 by Jana 17 Comments

A couple of months ago, I was given the gift of free yoga classes at a yoga studio near my house. Since I enjoy yoga, I decided to give a try. I’m glad I did. While I’m not sure that I’ll sign up for more classes on my own, it’s been an interesting experience and I’ll definitely finish the entire series of classes (I’m hoping that my opinion is not being tainted by the fact that the classes were free).

As I was going through the 90 minute class, noticed a few things:

  • The room was the hottest room I’d ever been in. It was like practicing yoga inside of an oven. I half expected there to be cupcakes baking in the corner of the room, it was that hot.
  • There were a lot more people in there than I had planned on. These classes are not cheap and the studio is in a somewhat shady shopping center. I was not expecting the 20 or so people who were in the room with me.
  • The number of “real” people greatly outnumbered the amount of college students (have I mentioned that I live very close to a major university?). This was actually comforting on a weird level.

I also learned that, no matter how hard I try, I cannot turn my brain off. In fact, as I was going through the class, I couldn’t help but think of all the ways learning yoga is like paying off debt:

yoga post

It’s uncomfortable and very, very sweaty

When you first start learning the different yoga poses, it is awkward, uncomfortable and weird. Your body twists and turns into positions that you never thought it could. You’re sitting or standing or lunging in ways that, really, feel anything but normal. You want so much to give up and sit or stand in a way that feels right to you. But you need to keep going until it stops being uncomfortable. You will also sweat. A lot. You will sweat in places you didn’t know you could sweat. Which makes it all the more uncomfortable

When you start to pay off debt, it feels uncomfortable to say no to the new TV or gadget or vacation. It’s awkward to start cooking at home. It’s unnatural to pay off debt instead of accruing more. Eventually, though, you get used to the uncomfortable and sometimes sweaty situations involved in paying down debt. After a while, it’s not so hard or uncomfortable anymore.

You need to check your ego at the door

No one who starts out doing yoga is any good at it. If you expect to be perfect, don’t even try. The truth of the matter is, you will look ridiculous no matter how hard you try not to. You will make mistakes. You’ll probably fall down. But it’s okay. Everyone else in the room is in the same position (pun sort of intended). Also? No one is looking at you. They’re too busy concentrating on not falling down to worry if you look like an ass. And you certainly can’t be afraid to ask for help. There is no room to be self-conscious.

Just like paying off debt. It’s fine if you don’t know what you’re doing. It’s fine to ask for help. It’s acceptable to look a little foolish. It’s absolutely fine, and somewhat expected, that you’re going to fall on your ass. But don’t be embarrassed. Don’t be scared to ask for help from someone who’s been in your shoes. Everyone who’s ever been in your situation has done the exact same thing you’re doing now and we’re more than happy to talk to you.

It forces you to look at yourself

The front of the yoga studio is lined with mirrors. The instructor stands directly in front of the mirror so the rest of class is forced to face here, therefore facing the mirrors as well. I hate looking at myself, especially for extended periods of time. I wind up examining every flaw that I have (perceived or real). However, the mirrors are there so I can see if I’m doing the poses as correctly as possible; they are an accurate reflection of what I’m doing. You can’t lie to a mirror, especially if you want to improve.

Budgets are the mirrors of personal finance. You can’t get out of debt if you don’t have a budget. Putting down, on paper, what you’re doing in terms of saving, spending, debts, bills–they all paint an accurate picture of how you’re spending your money. Budgets provide a reflection of your finances. And if you want to get out of debt, or manage your money better, you need to take a look at your budget.

The vocabulary is weird

Yoga is full of all kinds of strange words that not only can I not pronounce, I cannot even begin to spell. When you first start doing yoga, you typically spend the majority of the class smiling and nodding and acting like you understand what’s being said.  But the more you hear the words, and the more you learn to associate them with certain poses and actions, the less strange the words become. They actually wind up becoming a normal part of your vocabulary, and you forget that at one point, you had no clue what those words meant. Learning these words makes you more effective at your yoga practice.

The same thing happens with personal finance terms. They’re intimidating at first. You act like you know what they mean while making a mental note to Google them as soon as you get a chance. But the more you learn, the more you immerse yourself in understanding personal finance, the less intimidating the terms become. They become a part of your standard vernacular. And then you can’t imagine not knowing them. Learning these terms makes you more effective at managing your money and getting handle on your debts and your goals.

Having the proper equipment is essential

One of my favorite parts of yoga is the fact that you don’t need to wear shoes. For the most part, I hate shoes. I would wear flip-flops or go barefoot all the time if I could. Plus, I usually have fun toenail polish that I like to show off. However, that doesn’t mean that you don’t need any equipment. You need a mat, water (lots of water) and comfortable clothes. Without these pieces of equipment, doing yoga is going to be extremely difficult. No matter how good your intentions are when you start, if you’re not properly equipped, you won’t last.

When you start to take control of your finances, you need the proper equipment. You need a pen and paper or a spreadsheet. You need a good book or website to give you direction. You need a support network to help you through. You need to let those who are close to you know what you’re doing. You need specific and personal motivation to keep going when things are tough. Without these mechanisms in place, it’ll be easy to quit. And you certainly don’t want to do that.

I also learned one final lesson in my yoga classes: Inevitably, someone will mistakenly fart. And you cannot laugh, no matter how much you want to (you also realize how much self-control you actually have when you’re trying not to laugh). Not just because we’re adults but because it’s not nice to laugh at someone’s mistake. Just like sometimes, when someone’s paying off debt, she’ll make a mistake. Or two or five. And it’s not nice to laugh at her either.


 

 

Filed Under: Money, Money Motivation, random

Money or mental health?

October 20, 2011 by Jana 20 Comments

How much money would you sacrifice to save your mental health? This week, I determined that figure.

Would you like me to explain?

Here’s the long-winded explanation: I have a part-time job teaching criminal justice for an online school (I’m not going to say which one but suffice it to say, it’s probably the one you’re thinking of). It’s not too difficult of a job. I get to work it when it’s convenient, I get to work from home or anywhere else (so no extra babysitting required) that has internet access, I have a good deal of freedom with my syllabus, and, as long as I’m adhering to deadlines and certain requirements, I get left alone. I do have a once a year performance review but that’s fine. As far as part-time jobs go, it’s one of the easiest, noninvasive ones I could ask for (except for the whole grading papers thing. That’s time-consuming and very invasive) and I feel fortunate that I was able to get the job when I did.

I’ve had the job for just over 3 years. At this point, my classes don’t take up a huge part of my time and I don’t spend a whole lot of time on my classes. Since I’ve been teaching them for so long, it’s not only just part of my regular routine but teaching them has become second nature. However, the classes run year-round in 9 week blocks so I’m always teaching something. Always. I have not had a stretch of more than 4 weeks where I have not been teaching at least one class. Every vacation I’ve had in the last 3 years has been a working vacation.

For a while, I didn’t mind. It was crucial that I earned the money so we could eliminate our debt. Not having debt was more important to me than having a “real” vacation. I was willing to sacrifice relaxing at that time so that I wouldn’t have the stress of debt later on (for the record, my husband did and still does work a second job as well so it was not totally on me to bring in extra income). As a result, I never turned down a class. If a scheduler came to me last minute and needed a replacement, I said yes. Every solicitation that was sent to my inbox was accepted. If they wanted me to teach two concurrent sections, I happily agreed. And so it went for 3 years.

I still keep accepting classes. Even though most of our debt is paid off at this point, I still keep teaching because the money is good and it’s fairly easy to earn. The money that was once going towards debt is now going towards some of the fun things. It’s nice to be able to keep them money in my account rather than giving it over to someone else. Except there’s one problem. I am burned out.

I am exhausted from constantly working two jobs. I have been working 7 days a week for pretty much the past 3 years. I miss having time off and actually being able to enjoy my weekends. The quality of the student enrolled in the school continues to backslide and I find myself having to teach basic grammar and literacy rather than the subject matter I’ve been charged with teaching. I find myself stressing about the job at odd hours of the night. A job that I once enjoyed and did not only for money but because I like teaching was now becoming the bane of my existence. I’ve stopped caring about whether or not the students learn. I’m doing everyone a disservice by continuing to teach right now.

So, this week, I did something I’ve never done before. I emailed my scheduler and told her that I could not teach the class I was scheduled to start next month. Then, the very next day, I was sent another solicitation for a class starting in December. I turned that one down, too.  I decided that focusing on my blog, my business in the making and my daughter were more important than the money I was going to earn from those classes. I chose to have my weekends free from class work and grading papers for students that don’t really care about my feedback anyway. I decided that when I’m with my daughter in Disney World in January, I want to be able to give her my complete attention and not bury myself in my laptop. I picked my mental health over money.

I get paid just under $1500 per class. I turned down two classes, meaning this week I gave up almost $3000. And I don’t care.

I don’t mean to sound cavalier when so many are struggling. I’ve been there. I know what it’s like to not have any money and to have to do whatever possible to earn a dollar. And I will start teaching again in a few months. But for now, I need a break. Because for the first time in a long time, I’m picking myself over money. I’ll do without whatever that money was going to buy. No vacation, concert, purse or frivolous item is worth what will happen if I don’t take a break.

My mental health is worth $3,000.

Filed Under: Money, random, work

Money Shuffle: FinCon11 edition

October 3, 2011 by Jana 9 Comments

This past weekend was the Financial Blogger Conference. I wish I were articulate enough to convey how astonishingly amazing was but since I’m not, I’ll express it in song. Which is why I now present Money Shuffle: FinCon edition.

The rules are the same: put my iPod on shuffle, get the first 5 songs and relate a story or recap an event. The story can relate to only the title; it does not have to relate to the subject matter of the song. In today’s round, the focus is on the conference. Let’s get started.

The Approaching Curve by Rise Against. I think it’s interesting that this was the first song that came up because it really encompasses what I feel was one of the general themes of the conference. Financial bloggers really are changing the way that people look at money and I think that in a few years, we’re going to be the standard. We are the approaching curve.

Pulling Mussels (From the Shell) by Squeeze. In my opinion, one of the purposes of the conference was to get us, as bloggers, to extract the best parts of ourselves and put it into our blogs. On another and slightly opposite note, I thought that since we’re all a bunch of writers who are very comfortable behind a computer (and working without pants), and I’m also painfully shy, it would be hard to pull conversations out of each other. So not the case.

Mama I’m Coming Home by Ozzy Osbourne. I actually did not think this was going to happen. My flight, originally scheduled to take off at 1:50, did not actually leave the ground until somewhere around 6. Then I had to wait for my luggage which really didn’t need to be checked but the airline staff panicked and thought there wouldn’t be enough room on the plane for the carry-ons but clearly they need their eyes checked because they have problems assessing spacial concepts. Then there was the 1/2 hour it took to find my car (another story for another day) plus the 1/2 hour drive home, not including stopping at Wawa for a much needed sandwich. Also, neighbor, when you’re watching my kid, can you please not drink Miller Lite? Thanks.

Gives You Hell by The All-American Rejects. So, yeah. I could probably talk about the amount of alcohol that I consumed that gave me a hell of a hangover. But instead, I’ll talk about the speakers that gave me hells of ideas (not sure if this is a phrase but I’m going with it) and Phil @ PT Money who organized a hell of a conference and the up and coming Money Bitches (or Bitches of Finance. The name is pending) who are going to give your money hell. Related: If you’d like to be a Bitch, we’re taking applications.

Safety Dance by the cast of Glee (originally by Men Without Hats). So this is absolutely my most favorite performance from all 3 seasons of Glee and I love that it’s in this edition of Money Shuffle. Because I? Got to meet some of my most favorite bloggers. Also, the party on Saturday night was full of dancing. Financial bloggers? Have rhythm (sort of. I can neither confirm nor deny that alcohol may have been involved).

Bonus song: What Will You Do With a B.A. in English? from Avenue Q. I think the title says it all.

Thanks for playing this round of Money Shuffle. I can’t wait for Money Shuffle: FinCon12 edition!

Filed Under: bloggers, entertainment, random

Who has a Bucket List? I have a Bucket List!

September 26, 2011 by Jana 17 Comments

A couple of weeks ago, J. Money at Budgets are Sexy announced a Bucket List contest (sponsored by Life Insurance Finder) where a person, chosen at random, could win $500. I thought this would be fun to do but kind of postponed forgot about it until my wonderful friend Mrs. C posted her list (although she calls hers a Just Do It list which is way more optimistic).

So what’s on my bucket list, you ask? Well I’m happy to tell you that I’d like to:

  1. Take my top off in public. OK, not really. But I do want to play the guitar in front of a crowd (let’s define crowd: 5 people unrelated to me). I’m not very good and I can’t do solos but I can do some basic chords and with some a lot of practice, I’m pretty somewhat proficient. I even have my set list picked out: Devil Inside, Ball and Chain, Brain Stew, and Beverly Hills.
  2. Play beer pong for a living. Again, not really but I do want to play in the World Series of Beer Pong in Las Vegas. I used to rule the pong table. I even won a tournament once! I’m still pretty good (and by good I mean that my skills are directly proportional to the amount of beer I drink. More beer=better skills) and I think that I could possibly, maybe even win a round.
  3. Publish a book. That strangers buy. I’ve wanted to be a writer for as long as I could form sentences (and since I started talking around 1, this is a long time) and publishing a book that is found in a bookstore would be the apex of that dream. I know I’ll never be a NYT best-selling author but to have a book that at least recoups the publishing costs would be a dream come true. Oh, did I also mention that I don’t want this to be a self-published book?
  4. Visit Australia, Fiji and New Zealand. I’m not talking a quick, two-week bus tour. I’m talking I want to take a 2 month, leisurely vacation, making sure I see everything I can think of while I’m there. I figure I’d only get there one time and I’d make the most of every moment. Although I am a bit scared of the large, violent animals that I keep hearing live over there. I want to be assured that a dingo will not steal my baby. (Also, I swear this has nothing to do with the fact that the sponsor of the giveaway is an Australian company. I didn’t even notice that until I went back to put the link in. You don’t believe me, do you?)
  5. Go Hollywood. Michael Buble, I don’t care what you say. Hollywood is not dead. And I want to be a part of it. I want to be in a movie or on a TV show (I’ll settle for being an extra, though having at least one line would be great) and go to the Emmys. And a Golden Globe party. And hang out with Jason Segel. And get all those really awesome seats at sporting events that celebrities seem to get. Although being on the cover of a tabloid doesn’t appeal to me. But it could for the right price…maybe. As long as the reporter doesn’t interpret the first statement of #1 on this list as literal.
That’s my list. It feels good to get it out there. Maybe I’ll even get started on trying to make some of them happen!

Filed Under: challenges, random

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Jana

I'm Jana ...

A book reading, nail polish wearing, binge watching, music loving, dog owning, reluctant cheer mom.
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