Jana Says

Living life from cover to cover

  • About Me
    • Contact
  • Reading
    • Judging Covers
    • Interview with a Bookworm
  • Life Happenings
    • Playlists
    • The Aldi Experiment
  • Mental Health
  • Show Us Your Books

Unsupportive friends? Let ’em go.

March 9, 2012 by Jana 22 Comments

Addie from Life and My Debts recently posted that her friends are completely unsupportive of her desire to become debt free. Their lack of support had her questioning her intentions and left her wondering if she’s bizarre for wanting to eliminate her debt. She started to think that she should just accept her debt and not worry about it for the next 14 years. The whole post made me quite sad. Why? Because, 10 years ago, Addie could have been me.

When I was 25, like Addie is, I didn’t understand the first thing about finances. I didn’t care that I had debt because everyone had debt! I didn’t think twice about using a credit card for things I couldn’t afford in cash and I certainly didn’t care about getting my then-fiancé’s (now husband) student loans paid off (after all, they were his. Not mine). I figured my credit card debt would take care of itself one day and living paycheck to paycheck with no real budget was the way to go. I had a full-time job with benefits, a car, a nice apartment…the works. My friends were all the same way and none of us at anytime ever discussed what it would be like to not have debt.

Come to think of it, we never really discussed money at all. Not in any sort of productive way anyway. When we would talk about money, it was which beers were on tap and what the cover charge was at our favorite bars and how much that really cute shirt cost. In my 20s, I never sat around with my friends discussing the importance of saving for a down payment or investing in our retirement funds or just using cash. For me and my friends, finances weren’t important. As long as we were doing what we wanted, it didn’t matter how we funded it. [Read more…]

Filed Under: beginnings, Money, Money Motivation, money moves, money tips, opinions

Grieving your debt? It really happens.

February 15, 2012 by Jana 17 Comments

If you’ve ever experienced paying off debt, you know how excruciating it is. It consumes most of your thoughts, uses all your money, tests your patience and forces you to make really tough choices. Everything you are, everything you believe, every ounce of discipline you have is put on trial when you’re dealing with your debt.

But something else happens during that time. Your debt?  It becomes part of your family. Sure, it’s the part of your family that gets drunk at Thanksgiving, tells horrible “pull my finger” jokes, forgets everyone’s birthdays and is generally unpleasant but it’s still part of the family. It’s a family member that’s been present in your life for a long time and when it’s gone, you’re left grieving.

Yes, it’s exciting to kick the son of bitch to the curb. You may have a funeral for your debt or write a touching tribute or even call Dave Ramsey and scream “We’re debt freeeeeeeeeee” but when that’s all done, and you sit down to look at your monthly budget, you notice something is missing.  There’s a void. And you’re not sure what to do because you don’t realize what a huge presence your debt repayment had in your life until it’s gone.

That’s what happened to me. When we made the final payment on our credit card debt, I wasn’t sure what to do. We had spent almost 5 years paying it off. Almost every spare penny was sent to that debt. Home repairs, vacations, new clothes—everything was put on hold so our extra money could be applied to our debt. Then, one day—just like that—it was gone. I had never had to plan a budget that didn’t involve debt repayment and honestly, it was uncomfortable. I didn’t know what to do with that extra money. That uncertainty almost made me wish for the debt payment again.

The more I thought about it, the more I realized that what I was experiencing was something akin to the 5 stages of grief. My thinking about eliminating my debt went like this:

Denial—The first thing I thought when I looked at my budget with no debt repayment factored in was “No way. There is no way I have no more credit card debt. That cannot possibly be my budget”.  It was hard to accept that all of our work had finally, and literally, paid off.

Anger—Once I realized my credit card debt was gone, I was pissed. Not so much because I didn’t have any left but because I couldn’t help but think that “I just spent 5 freaking years paying off debt! What a waste of time and money that was. If had that money back, I could (fill in pretty much anything)”

Bargaining—I don’t think I necessarily bargained to get my debt payment back. I can’t remember thinking “I’d do anything to bring back a few hundred dollars of debt. Just a few hundred dollars. That’s all I’m asking for”. Nope, I’m pretty confident I skipped this stage.

Depression—During this stage I did have a few moments where I thought to myself “What’s the point of getting excited about this being paid off. Something else is just going to happen and I’ll have all that debt again”. Then I smacked myself in the face and reminded myself that I am in control of what happens next.

Acceptance—It didn’t take a long time for me to accept that my credit card debt was gone. I came to terms with the fact that I had survived the 5 years of debt repayment and that, from now on, my finances were going to be greatly improved. And once I did allow myself to accept that fact, it was liberating.

Make no mistake. I don’t miss my debt at all. I’m over the moon glad it’s gone. But it was a huge shock to my system when I realized I no longer had to make a credit card payment. I had to come to terms with the fact that BrainGames was now over. Working through the 5 step process definitely helped.

And when that was done, I screamed with glee.

 

 

Filed Under: Money, Money Motivation, money tips

Money Tune Tuesday:Get Thru This

January 31, 2012 by Jana 6 Comments

When you’re in the middle of an awful situation–whether it’s emotional, financial, mental or some combination of the three–you don’t think you’re going to survive. It feels endless and hopeless. Each day is a trial. You start negotiating with yourself “If I can just get through this, I’ll be okay”.

It’s during those moments when we realize just how strong we actually are. When I was deep in debt, barely able to feed myself and my husband, I thought it would break me. I thought that there was no way I was going to have the strength to come out the other side. I promised myself that if I did survive those times, I would never ever go back.

I wished that I’d had a song to kind of use as my anthem. Rodney Atkins’s “If You’re Going Through Hell” helped as did Jimmy Eat World’s “The Middle“.  And strangely, so did Bob Marley’s “Three Little Birds”. Now, I have a new song to help me through new challenges. That song, today’s Money Tune, is The Art of Dying’s “Get Thru This”.

My favorite lyric? If I can get through this, I can get through anything.

Because that? Is totally what I need right now. I hope it helps you, too. Whatever you’re going through.

Filed Under: entertainment, Money Motivation, Money Tune Tuesday

Jeremy Renner inspires me

December 21, 2011 by Jana 12 Comments

I wanted to write a post today about how I am totally inspired by Jeremy Renner. I read an article on him a few weeks ago that talked about his early days as a struggling actor. How he couldn’t pay his electric bill and how Ramen was a treat. How he took small parts in movies but wasn’t getting recognized. How he started flipping houses just to pay the bills. How he was in The Hurt Locker and basically, his entire life changed. How, at 40, he is finally seeing the for which success he worked and struggled. I wanted to write about how that completely inspires me and encourages me. But my brain got stuck when I tried writing anything that makes sense. So please bear with me.

I tend to find inspiration in strange places. As I am now firmly in my 30s, I often tell myself that I’m too old to pursue a dream or learn a new skill or that I’ll never make it as a successful blogger/author/fill in the blank. There are so many people who have a fresher perspective or new ideas or confidence. Why would an audience flock to me when there are so many smarter, wittier, more talented writers than me? It’s hard to convince myself to compete with the “younger” crowd because really, who wants a fairly calm, middle aged dog when you can have an energetic, entertaining puppy?

Then I see stories about people like Jeremy Renner or Jane Lynch or Rodney Dangerfield, who didn’t find success until later in life. I realize that I’m not so much different than them. I have dreams and dedicaiton and work ethic and I hope, a little bit of talent. I’ve struggled to get to where I am. They didn’t quit even though they were competing against younger, differently talented, possibly better looking actors. They didn’t quit because it was financially tough. They didn’t quit because they knew how badly they wanted it and they believed that if they worked hard enough, it would eventually pay off (I’m not sure if this is actually true but I’m going to pretend that it is). Since they didn’t quit, I can’t quit. I try to believe that it will pay off.

Make no mistake about it, I don’t for one second believe that trying to pursue my dream of being a writer is ridiculous (though, on occasion, I do question its practicality). I don’t think anyone’s dream is ridiculous. If I do, I’m certainly not going to say anything. Because who am I to crush anyone else’s dream? That’s why I encourage my daughter to pursue her dream of being a mermaid (seriously, it’s what she wants to be when she grows up). As her mother, I will do everything possible to help her fulfill her mermaid dream. When she realizes that’s not possible, I will encourage her in whatever comes next. Because dreams are important. And you have to believe, as I do, that your dreams will eventually come true (yes, even my ludicrous one of interviewing Jason Segel).

That doesn’t mean that I think that dreams should be pursued with little to no planning. In order for me to pursue my dream, I had to have a familial support system as well as a network of other writers/bloggers. I had to find a niche where I belong (and I don’t for one second believe that finding a place in the personal finance world is an accident). Most importantly, I had to have my finances in order.

This March marks a huge month in my financial life. As of this March (possibly February), I will be completely nonmortgage debt free. My husband still has student loans but as far as what my name is on, the mortgage is all. Having this in my not-so-distant future means that I will be able to save money in an emergency-I-can’t-wait-to-quit-my-job fund and actually, for the first time in my 34 years, have the freedom to do what I want to do.  I still have income sources, and I’m working on a few ideas for other income streams, so I won’t be earning $0 which is comforting. But I’ll be earning that money doing what I believe I’m supposed be doing–writing.

I might never be a New York Times best selling author or make $1,000,000. But I’m fine with that. I bet Jeremy Renner never thought that he’s have 2 Academy Award nomiations. But the bottom line is that he’s a successful, working actor who can say, with certainty, “I’m an actor”. And as long as I’m writing, and I’m earning a few dollars, I can say, with certainty, that I’m a writer.

Even if I’m an older dog, I’m pretty sure I’m not out of tricks yet.

 

Filed Under: entertainment, Money Motivation, random

What downward dog taught me about money

November 9, 2011 by Jana 17 Comments

A couple of months ago, I was given the gift of free yoga classes at a yoga studio near my house. Since I enjoy yoga, I decided to give a try. I’m glad I did. While I’m not sure that I’ll sign up for more classes on my own, it’s been an interesting experience and I’ll definitely finish the entire series of classes (I’m hoping that my opinion is not being tainted by the fact that the classes were free).

As I was going through the 90 minute class, noticed a few things:

  • The room was the hottest room I’d ever been in. It was like practicing yoga inside of an oven. I half expected there to be cupcakes baking in the corner of the room, it was that hot.
  • There were a lot more people in there than I had planned on. These classes are not cheap and the studio is in a somewhat shady shopping center. I was not expecting the 20 or so people who were in the room with me.
  • The number of “real” people greatly outnumbered the amount of college students (have I mentioned that I live very close to a major university?). This was actually comforting on a weird level.

I also learned that, no matter how hard I try, I cannot turn my brain off. In fact, as I was going through the class, I couldn’t help but think of all the ways learning yoga is like paying off debt:

yoga post

It’s uncomfortable and very, very sweaty

When you first start learning the different yoga poses, it is awkward, uncomfortable and weird. Your body twists and turns into positions that you never thought it could. You’re sitting or standing or lunging in ways that, really, feel anything but normal. You want so much to give up and sit or stand in a way that feels right to you. But you need to keep going until it stops being uncomfortable. You will also sweat. A lot. You will sweat in places you didn’t know you could sweat. Which makes it all the more uncomfortable

When you start to pay off debt, it feels uncomfortable to say no to the new TV or gadget or vacation. It’s awkward to start cooking at home. It’s unnatural to pay off debt instead of accruing more. Eventually, though, you get used to the uncomfortable and sometimes sweaty situations involved in paying down debt. After a while, it’s not so hard or uncomfortable anymore.

You need to check your ego at the door

No one who starts out doing yoga is any good at it. If you expect to be perfect, don’t even try. The truth of the matter is, you will look ridiculous no matter how hard you try not to. You will make mistakes. You’ll probably fall down. But it’s okay. Everyone else in the room is in the same position (pun sort of intended). Also? No one is looking at you. They’re too busy concentrating on not falling down to worry if you look like an ass. And you certainly can’t be afraid to ask for help. There is no room to be self-conscious.

Just like paying off debt. It’s fine if you don’t know what you’re doing. It’s fine to ask for help. It’s acceptable to look a little foolish. It’s absolutely fine, and somewhat expected, that you’re going to fall on your ass. But don’t be embarrassed. Don’t be scared to ask for help from someone who’s been in your shoes. Everyone who’s ever been in your situation has done the exact same thing you’re doing now and we’re more than happy to talk to you.

It forces you to look at yourself

The front of the yoga studio is lined with mirrors. The instructor stands directly in front of the mirror so the rest of class is forced to face here, therefore facing the mirrors as well. I hate looking at myself, especially for extended periods of time. I wind up examining every flaw that I have (perceived or real). However, the mirrors are there so I can see if I’m doing the poses as correctly as possible; they are an accurate reflection of what I’m doing. You can’t lie to a mirror, especially if you want to improve.

Budgets are the mirrors of personal finance. You can’t get out of debt if you don’t have a budget. Putting down, on paper, what you’re doing in terms of saving, spending, debts, bills–they all paint an accurate picture of how you’re spending your money. Budgets provide a reflection of your finances. And if you want to get out of debt, or manage your money better, you need to take a look at your budget.

The vocabulary is weird

Yoga is full of all kinds of strange words that not only can I not pronounce, I cannot even begin to spell. When you first start doing yoga, you typically spend the majority of the class smiling and nodding and acting like you understand what’s being said.  But the more you hear the words, and the more you learn to associate them with certain poses and actions, the less strange the words become. They actually wind up becoming a normal part of your vocabulary, and you forget that at one point, you had no clue what those words meant. Learning these words makes you more effective at your yoga practice.

The same thing happens with personal finance terms. They’re intimidating at first. You act like you know what they mean while making a mental note to Google them as soon as you get a chance. But the more you learn, the more you immerse yourself in understanding personal finance, the less intimidating the terms become. They become a part of your standard vernacular. And then you can’t imagine not knowing them. Learning these terms makes you more effective at managing your money and getting handle on your debts and your goals.

Having the proper equipment is essential

One of my favorite parts of yoga is the fact that you don’t need to wear shoes. For the most part, I hate shoes. I would wear flip-flops or go barefoot all the time if I could. Plus, I usually have fun toenail polish that I like to show off. However, that doesn’t mean that you don’t need any equipment. You need a mat, water (lots of water) and comfortable clothes. Without these pieces of equipment, doing yoga is going to be extremely difficult. No matter how good your intentions are when you start, if you’re not properly equipped, you won’t last.

When you start to take control of your finances, you need the proper equipment. You need a pen and paper or a spreadsheet. You need a good book or website to give you direction. You need a support network to help you through. You need to let those who are close to you know what you’re doing. You need specific and personal motivation to keep going when things are tough. Without these mechanisms in place, it’ll be easy to quit. And you certainly don’t want to do that.

I also learned one final lesson in my yoga classes: Inevitably, someone will mistakenly fart. And you cannot laugh, no matter how much you want to (you also realize how much self-control you actually have when you’re trying not to laugh). Not just because we’re adults but because it’s not nice to laugh at someone’s mistake. Just like sometimes, when someone’s paying off debt, she’ll make a mistake. Or two or five. And it’s not nice to laugh at her either.


 

 

Filed Under: Money, Money Motivation, random

  • « Previous Page
  • 1
  • …
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
  • 6
  • Next Page »
Jana

I'm Jana ...

A book reading, nail polish wearing, binge watching, music loving, dog owning, reluctant cheer mom.
Learn more ...
  • Bloglovin
  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest
  • RSS
  • Twitter

Generic selectors
Exact matches only
Search in title
Search in content
Search in posts
Search in pages
Filter by Categories
Activities
beginnings
bills
bloggers
Books
budget
challenges
charity
Confessions
Cooking
coupons
Crafting
entertainment
Family
Family matters
food
Gardening
Giveaways
goals
Guest posts
guests
Home Decorating
Life
mental health
Money
Money Motivation
money moves
money tips
Money Tune Tuesday
opinions
parties
Pets
Pioneer Project
products
quotes
random
Random thoughts
recipes
Recipes
Relationships
savings
school
Sewing
shopping
Sidebar Shots
Uncategorized
work
writing

Archives

Reader favorites

Sorry. No data so far.

Show Us Your Books. Join the Link-Up. Talk Books the Second Tuesday of Every Month

Connect with Me

Subscribe to Jana Says

Jana Says
© 2017 by Jana Says. All Rights Reserved.
Crafted with by sasspurrella designs.

Copyright © 2025 · Lifestyle Pro Theme on Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in