Life Archives - Page 53 of 96

#noshame: 8 weird habits

March 30, 2015 by Jana 39 Comments

I’m the first to admit that I have numerous quirks and pet peeves. I don’t fight them or try to change them; rather, I accept them as part of who I am. After all, they’re what make me special.

Or weird.

Or insane.

Maybe all of the above.

Have a look at these and then you decide:

All my hangers face the same direction. As does everything hanging on the hangers.
I eat cookies in even numbers.
I separate Skittles and M&Ms by color and eat them in those color groups.
Socks have to match, and if I find an orphan, I’ll put it in a different spot in my drawer until its mate shows up. It cannot mingle with the pairs. But apparently they can save house elves.
Books go on the shelf in size order.
In the pantry, can labels MUST face forward as do the nutrition label for boxes. I know, it’s some Sleeping With the Enemy shit right there.
If there’s a notification on my iPhone, I have to deal with it as soon as I notice. The screen needs to be free from angry red numbers.
When making the bed, the blanket length needs to be even all the way around and I will fight and wrestle with the said blanket until it is.

How about you guys? Do you do anything like this?

P.S. There’s no picture for #1 and that’s because my internet kept crapping out while I was looking for one and I lost what little patience I have left today. Monday, you can go fuck yourself.

Save

This week in everything that sucks…You know those weeks where everything bad seems to happen all at once? That was this week for me. Not only did I get unexpectedly sick with a cold that came from no where and won’t go away, my husband’s teaching job decided to cut his pay for one class more than we expected due to enrollment, and if you saw this face on Instagram the other day, you know my dog, Barkley, ruptured his ACL on Tuesday chasing after the mail truck. And guess who doesn’t get to see The Breakfast Club in the theater for its 30th anniversary? That’s right. ME. All the rage.

This is the night it happened, right before he got his pain pill. Such a sad face.

This week in unexpected blessings…Barkley’s injury was way less serious than it could have been. He didn’t break anything, he doesn’t need surgery, and because he’s so small, once the rupture heals, he can function just fine (with maybe a little limp). Also, my in-laws are watching the dogs this weekend, for free, while we’re in Atlantic City for a cheer competition, we’ve been getting Showtime for free since the beginning of the month and continuing until the end of May, and I created a tasty recipe for iced coffee using the coffee beans I don’t like. No waste FTW!

This week in nostalgia…Better Than Ezra is touring with Uncle Kracker, Eve 6, and Sugar Ray. I got to have lunch with Steph from Life According to Steph (it had been 15 years since the last time we saw each other! Crazy that it had been that long and, for those who don’t know, Steph and I were friends in college. Like, all 4 years of it). I have been listening to my iPod with its vast library of songs I had forgotten about. And also reading this list of the best 80s shows.

This week in reading…I have been reading Jo Nesbo’s The Son for a week now. Ordinarily an eBook takes me only a few days but this book is so long (just shy of 500 pages) and there are a plethora of characters and plotlines that my brain gets dizzy and I have to put it down. That said, it’s an interesting book. Full review coming on 4/7 for the next Show Us Your Books linkup (not 4/14 as previously stated). Not sure what I’ll pick up next as I have 5 books on my nightstand. Probably whichever one has the closest due date.

This week in things I don’t give a shit about…the guy leaving One Direction. I didn’t know which one he was, I had to look it up, and there is no conceivable way I could care less. The X-Files returning to TV. March Madness.

This week in internet reading…In a similar vein to the Hot Dudes Reading Instagram account, there was this post from Book Riot on 14 Days as a Public Transit Reading Spy. I love the variety in what people choose to read! As someone who spends a good part of each day listening to music, I found this piece on the scientific effect music has on your every day life to be fascinating. And as someone who used to be great about managing her time but currently sucks a fat one at it, I enjoyed this article about the 7 core beliefs of extraordinary time managers.

This week in funny…

Have a great weekend! Hope you get to do something fun or relaxing!

Save

This week in…: Volume 7

March 20, 2015 by Jana 35 Comments

First, thank you all for your comments, feedback, and general awesomeness on Wednesday’s post. It showed everything that’s awesome about the blogger community and why I love it so much. Because even when you feel like you’re alone, you’re really not.

That said, let’s move on to this week’s recap.

This week in frugaling…I’ve recently started drinking coffee on a few days a week basis and because I’m cheap, I usually make it at home. I bought some Starbucks coffee grounds (which I do not like) but I did learn that I not only can get a little star on my rewards card from buying it but I can get a free tall coffee when the bag is empty so it’s like getting half my money back. On another note, does anyone know what to do with coffee beans you don’t like? I’m inclined to throw them out but it seems like a waste.

This week in reading…Last week I finished The Martian (LOVED IT and I am so glad I bowed to Kristen’s peer pressure to read it), moved on to Dan Harris’s 10% Happier, finished that and now I’m reading Jo Nesbo’s The Son. I also picked up Mobile Library by David Whitehouse and now have enough books to get me through until next month’s Show Us Your Books linkup on April 14th. Mark it down.

This week in TV watching…I binge watched Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt and while I generally cannot tolerate Jane Krakowski (although I’ll admit, towards the last few episodes, my tolerance level increased), the show is awesome (edit: it took me a few episodes to get into but once I did, I enjoyed it. Like Parks and Rec, I’m glad I didn’t quit on it) and Ellie Kemper is spectacular. Casting her could not have been a better choice. And speaking of Netflix shows, Bloodline releases TODAY and since I have a major crush on Kyle Chandler, I’m thrilled the show is finally here (and thanks to Tonya for the heads up all those months ago about the show).

This week in parenting…Not only did I finally order a very sparkly cheer mom shirt (which, thanks to very poor word placement, I have to implement the Downy trick to stretch out the material) but I actually remembered to text one of her friend’s moms to schedule a play date, I let her sleep in bed with me after she had a nightmare (the husband was out of town for a few days so there was room) despite my strict “no child in the bed” rule, she put her laundry away without being reminded, and I learned she’s been buying salads for lunch at school. I feel like I’ve won all the parenting battles this week.

This week in internet links…Buzzfeed hit the mark with two great posts, 13 Incredibly Detailed Floor Plans of the Most Famous TV Homes and This is What Depression Looks Like (incidentally, I wrote a post with the same name awhile ago). Time shared a great article from XO Jane on how Being a Stay At Home Mom is Not a Job (as a current SAHM, I loved the perspective in this one) and The NY Times shared a photo series on what 2,000 calories looks like. Very interesting.

This week in laughs…

That’s all she wrote this week. I’ll be back on Monday when I interview myself about my reading habits. Have a great weekend!

Save

Thoughts from a colonoscopy prep

March 16, 2015 by Jana 46 Comments

Did you guys have a good weekend? I did. Well, the best I could after spending Friday in colonoscopy hell. Let me be clear–I know they’re necessary. But holy hell, are they horrible. Not so much the procedure because I was completely unconscious but everything else surrounding it.

I’ve done random train of thought posts before (you can read them here, here, and here) so let’s add to the collection with all the fun things that went through my head during the whole colonoscopy event.

Wow, this is a lot of stuff I need to buy.

I really have to take the weekly dose of two laxatives in four hours? That seems excessive and I’m pretty sure it’s going to be painful.

This Gatorade mixed with Miralax doesn’t taste too terrible.

This is the worst Gatorade I have ever had in my life and if I have to drink one more sip I will throw it up all over the place.

If I throw up, do I get to cancel the procedure?

No, I’m not cancelling it. I’ve come too far and I haven’t forgone food for two days to cancel now.

They won’t notice if I spill some of it down the drain.

HOW IS IT POSSIBLE FOR ONE PERSON TO POOP THIS MUCH?!

How is there anything left in my stomach? I think everything I’ve eaten over the past month has been flushed away.

Hmmm. I wonder how much weight I’ve lost from all this. *steps on scale* Three and half pounds?! Ridiculous.

Is this how celebrities lose weight before awards shows because it doesn’t seem worth it. I’m sure Spanx does a better job. Same results, less gas.

Oh, finally. It’s over. I can get some sleep that’s not on the bathroom floor.

I was wrong. THIS is the worst drink I’ve ever had. Perhaps I should not have brushed my teeth before I drank the grape flavored magnesium citrate. I am the queen of bad choices.

Really? More pooping?! I’m pretty sure my stomach is just inventing things to eliminate.

There are an awful lot of people in this waiting room. I think I’m disturbed by the amount of people with stomach and/or butt problems.

Let’s play a game. Who’s here for a procedure and who’s their ride home?

This game is easy. Anyone in comfy pants is clearly getting prodded.

Oh, wait. There’s a couple both wearing jeans. Challenge accepted!

People look funny when they’re coming off of anesthesia.

HOW AM I STILL POOPING??

They’re giving me propofol? Isn’t that the drug that killed Michael Jackson? (FYI, I said this out loud, loudly, to my prep nurse. #noshame)

If I had the ability I would punch the anesthesia nurse in the nuts because I want him to feel the pain that he is inflicting on my with this IV needle.

Wait, how is it over? I literally remember nothing after I yelled at the nurse that he hurt my arm.

Oh, thank god. The pooping is over.

I need a nap and some food.

Fun follow up story: So, I was pretty convinced that people could tell I was on something and in my head, I looked either really drunk or high. Turns out, I was right. One of the other cheer parents is an undercover detective and when we stopped to get food, they (I don’t want to say if it’s one of the moms or dads) were parked in the same parking lot and their partner held the door open for us. When my husband saw this parent later that night, he/she relayed that his/her partner thought something was wrong with me and my husband had to clarify. Reasonable explanation yet still mildly embarrassing.

All in all, the prep was worse than the procedure (you know, because I don’t remember it) and fortunately, everything is normal and I don’t have to do it again until I’m 50. Hopefully by then they’ve improved upon the whole prep process.

Some stuff and some things

March 12, 2015 by Jana 29 Comments

We’re diving into some Stuff and Things rather than the weekly recap because I have a thing tomorrow and I won’t be, you know, conscious, so I’m hanging out with the lovely Joey and Kristin this week instead.

Can I just say how much I love the Show Us Your Books linkup and how it’s basically my favorite blogging day of the month? First, thank you so much to everyone who participates! It means a lot to both me and Steph. Second, my to-read list continues to explode because of it. It thrills me how we all have different taste in books, with some overlap (cough–The Girl on the Train–cough), and I’m learning about books I never would have heard of otherwise.
Colonoscopy prep is the worst. I want a vegetable. And laxatives are no one’s friend.
After mentioning it last week, some of you expressed interest in the link to my side project/creative writing site. I was going to just email the link to those people directly but then I thought that was a bad choice. I’ll just share it with everyone. So here it is: Prompted Pieces. I’m only posting about 2-3 times per week right now but I might increase that at some point. Not sure yet. Hope you guys have as much fun reading it as I do writing it.
I finally finished and sent off my resume to the job I really, really, really want. And now I’m nervous that they won’t want me. Anxiety is fun.
Last weekend, we rented St. Vincent and Foxcatcher. St. Vincent is a fabulous movie. Bill Murray and Melissa McCarthy are simply awesome and the kid in the movie is going to have a long, long career. Don’t bother yourself with Foxcatcher. Slow, tedious, and it bothers me that Channing Tatum’s performance has gone virtually unrecognized. Honestly, he was the best part of the movie, and it has nothing to do with how he looks because I don’t find him that attractive.
I get irrationally angry when I really like someone on a TV show or in a movie and then I can’t stalk the actor on social media.
Last weekend after we were done at the beach Chocolate Festival, we went to a bookstore and at the bookstore, I saw a sign or book stating the average person passes something like 1 liter of gas per day. I have so many questions about this. For instance, who figured this out? Second, who volunteered to be studied? Third, how did they measure it? Also, if I were part of that study, I’d throw off the average. Big time.
We leave for Disney in just under 5 weeks. The child still has no idea. We’ve been keeping it a surprise for the last 5 months and with this little bit of time left, my big mouth almost ruined it. Fortunately, she’s oblivious and didn’t pick up on it but I’m starting to worry about my self-control.
I read and save a ton of links with the intention to share them and then I never do. If there is a version of hoarders for links, I need it because I keep saving more and get rid of none. That said, here are three of my favorites from the last few weeks: 33 Signs That Were Vandalized with the Most Hilarious Responses Ever (how’s that for click bait?), 10 Reasons Why Losing Your Shit Will Make Your Life Come Together, and this one about the MLB player who lives in a van in a WalMart parking lot.
My favorite weekly funnies:

Hope you guys have a great weekend! I’ll probably be in the bathroom the whole time and I’ve never been so glad to have an iPad and an endless stack of books. See you Monday!

Save

#noshame: 8 weird habits

This week in…: Volume 9

This week in…: Volume 7

Thoughts from a colonoscopy prep

Some stuff and some things

Connect with Me

Subscribe to Jana Says