It’s time once again for a round of someone was wrong on the internet and I must fix it! This time it’s not about parenting or even politics (we’ll address that on Friday for a special version of my Friday six-pack) but rather a topic that’s near to me this month…money. You know. Because of the spending freeze.
Anyway, I somehow came across this post about cheap ways to destress. I totally get his sentiment and the point he’s attempting to make but I’m not quite sure he understands what he’s saying. For instance, have you ever replaced a shower head? First of all, if you want one that’s halfway decent, it’s not going to be cheap (well, I mean, maybe it is depending on your definition of “cheap” which, admittedly, is pretty subjective) and also not fun to install. Especially if you’re short like I am. It winds up being the EXACT definition of stress rather than a way to destress. However, you know what IS a cheap way to destress? TAKING A SHOWER. Or a bath, if you’re into that. (I am not. Taking a bath is the equivalent of marinating in your own dirt. NO THANK YOU).
Or how about hiring someone to clean your house or apartment? Maybe as a one-off but on a regular basis that shit adds up. Same with subscription services and grocery delivery and massages and mani/pedis and pretty much everything on his list. Yes, as a temporary relief, these are great choices provided you have the extra money laying around to spend on these little luxuries. Unfortunately, a lot of people do not.
And, if I’m being honest, the list he gave shows his privilege. Particularly the phrase “Enjoy the knowledge that your upgraded standard of living is actually saving you money.” It’s such a loaded sentence I legit don’t even know where to begin picking it apart. I’m not even sure I want to for fear I won’t be able to stop. But I will say this: the danger of lists like this one is that it doesn’t advocate doing things you can afford; it merely advocates buying smaller things to prevent a larger, more expensive purchase. Some people might read it as justification to put a massage on a credit card or use money designated for savings to throw a party instead. That opens up a Pandora’s box of bad choices and financial missteps that can cause even more problems.
Because upgrading your standard of living does not automatically mean a relief of stress. In many instances, and for many people, it actually brings more because one upgrade snowballs into two then into three and so on. And the little things can, after awhile, add up to the cost of the one item you were trying to avoid. It becomes self-defeating (and debt inducing). So, maybe, if you want the big thing, get the big thing and stay away from the little ones. It’s sort of like when you have a craving for a donut. You don’t want to eat the donut because, although delicious, donuts are calorie laden. So instead of eating the donut, you eat 45 other foods that leave you unsatisfied and still craving a donut and you’ve consumed about 34 times more calories than if you had just eaten the donut.
Sometimes, JUST EAT THE FUCKING DONUT. It’ll be better for you in the long run.
Now, I’m not saying run out and buy a new car if you can’t afford your rent but if you need a car to get to work so you can keep your apartment and the car is causing you stress and you’re spending more money in repairs than if you would just get a new car, then get a new to you car. Set a budget. Comparison shop. And get a new car. That will help destress your life. Maybe it’s not the cheapest way but have you ever dealt with car stress? It sucks and can absolutely impact your quality of life, particularly if you live somewhere (like I do) that doesn’t have reliable or accessible public transportation and you need to get around.
I 100% guarantee that sometimes and in certain situation getting a new car eliminates stress more than a latte.
That said, let’s bring it back around to his initial idea of cheap ways to destress which, as we’ve covered, are not necessarily cheap. I mentioned one alternative to his ideas: taking a bath or shower.
Here are a few other ACTUALLY cheap ideas to destress:
- READ. Obviously this is my first choice.
- Get outside. Too cold to go out? Watch a sunrise or sunset or a snowfall or listen to the rain. Nature is relaxing.
- Talk to someone who makes you laugh. I love my friends who make me laugh and somehow they know exactly when I need them. See also: catch up with someone you haven’t talked to in awhile.
- Pet an animal. There’s all kinds of studies that show animals lower blood pressure and keep you calm and are good for your mental health. So, if you can (and you’re not afraid or allergic), pet a dog or cat or guinea pig or whatever.
- Take a day off. Stop hustling, stop working, stop thinking, stop doing anything that is causing you stress. Disconnect from everything for a day and do whatever the fuck you want.
- Nap.
- Make time for something that relaxes you that you rarely make the time to do. Knit, bake cookies, scrapbook, color, watch your favorite movie, play a board game, throw a football…whatever. The possibilities are endless.
- Get something to take care of. Specifically, a plant or fish or a hermit crab or something else cheap and small and easy to maintain. Maybe this is more for mental health (as in, having something to take care of gives you purpose and helps get you through the day) but it still works.
- Light candles, drink coffee or tea, and sit still, without electronics, for 15 minutes.
- Listen to music. Music is cathartic. It allows you to feel all the emotions. You can have angry songs or dancing songs or songs that make you happy or sad songs. Music can match your mood and sometimes, it understands exactly what you need more than anything.
This is not a comprehensive list or all-inclusive or even original. It’s mostly common sense but I guess we all sometimes need a reminder that you don’t have to spend money to alleviate stress in your life.
How do you guys destress?
Linda Sheridan says
Love ❤️ your list! All good! I would add to count the blessings. All that is the opposite of what may be causing stress. I know I create my own stress
Many times. Live and learn and learn and
Learn.
Great post!
Love, Steph’s Momma
Stephanie says
Okay right?? Baths are gross, the whole idea of them is gross. I love your list though. Napping and petting Hawkeye are my favorite activities!
Ashley @ The Wandering Weekenders says
I can’t believe that he said to install a shower head in order to relive stress! That stresses me out just thinking about it! I like your idea of reading instead!
Nadine says
Your destress is much better and more realistic! I laughed at installing a shower head. WTF?
Rebecca Jo says
I love this & want to make a goal of checking all these things off a list 😉
You’re so right – if you’re stressing out (love the donut analogy) – then just freaking DO IT! Put it to rest. Move on.
I’ll add KNITTING onto the list 😉 It’s about keeping the hands & mind busy.
Christina says
I’m also not into baths! If I do take one (which is like twice a year) I take a shower first. Haha! I’m on a spending freeze here too! It started today, so wish me luck! I definitely read to destress. I also reluctantly go outside with my kids. I never want to, but once I’m out there I feel so much better.
BTW, I’m blogging again! I have a new domain though: http://www.easilyentertained.net
Tanya @ A Mindful Migration says
Lordy, that was a horrible, horrible post. He is clueless and honestly, shame on centsai for not recognizing it as a bad post. First off, many people SAVE for those expensive vacations and one way they SAVE for them is by skipping things like coffee or small purchases that don’t mean much to them. This future vacation is what helps them stay calm when shit hits the fan because they have it to look forward to. Now I agree that we need to have small, inexpensive destressors in our lives too. But what he listed are ways to de-stress, period. For those who either have discretionary income or people who have become stressed-out, penny-pinching fools and need to learn how to enjoy their money responsibly. And buying something small or inexpensive to avoid buying something big is a band-aid and not actually solving problems of stress or learning how to handle money wisely. I love your donut analogy because #truth. I’m going to stop bitching because my eye is starting to twitch.
I don’t enjoy baths, mainly because I don’t fit properly in a bathtub. 😀 Too small. #1, 4 and 6 are my personal favorites and go-tos. #5 is really important and one that gets overlooked. Some days it is okay to do absolutely nothing and let your batteries recharge. You can’t hustle and/or work every moment of the day.
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Jenn @ Optimization, Actually says
I love that you didn’t include yoga or meditation. I mean, sure they’re effective, but they still go on the “I know I should and don’t always wanna” pile. All of these sound awesome and reading is definitely my go-to.
Gwen says
I loved your list! I had a hard time even reading the original article because the first couple sentences about vacations and getting away from your job didn’t seem to connect with the rest of the article and that really annoyed me so this guy already started off with at least two strikes.
ShootingStarsMag says
Oh my god, I love that gif! It’s so true sometimes. But yeah, lists/articles like this are awful because it really doesn’t take into account the everyday person. I love your ideas though. I’d totally suggest reading or taking a nap. 🙂
-Lauren
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Dani says
I love rebuttal posts, and completely agree- baths are gross! The standard of living one in particular is a slippery slope for just the reasons you mentioned. My go-to is reading (I have a hard time taking naps), and instead of going to get manis/pedis I do them at home while jamming out to music. It makes me feel pretty AND it’s cheaper- win-win!
Michael says
That really was a loaded sentence. There have been times where I’ve “upgraded my quality of living” only to directly add more stress to my life because you then have to MAINTAIN that quality and sometimes that’s not possible. Case in point, back when I used to get UV gel nails at $60 a fill. Sure the hour of pampering was stress free and calming but knowing I’d have to go back in 3 weeks to do it all again and shell out the money at a time when it reallt should have been put elsewhere…. NOT stress free