Jana Says

Living life from cover to cover

Rants on parade

I had originally planned this post to be a rant about one specific topic but as I kept thinking (always a dangerous thing), I found more that I needed to rant about. So instead of one long rant, it’ll be some shorter rants about a few topics. 

#squadgoals, #relationshipgoals. I despise these hashtags, especially when they apply to celebrity ass kissing. It irks the shit out of me when we see a celebrity couple doing something that THE REST OF US ALREADY DO with our spouses/partners/friends/kids/general life and then we’re told by whatever trash website that that’s what we should aspire to be. And let’s not even discuss the guilt factor that comes into play that we don’t do those things. A) NO. They have access to privilege and resources that the rest of us don’t so OF COURSE it looks like they’re way more awesome than we are. B) Why do I want to be something that I’m not. I’m nothing like Taylor Swift and her friends or Judd Apatow and his friends so why do I need to model my friendships after what they do? Why isn’t being how I am good enough? I guess it’s not enough to have fucked up body images as a result of our obsessive celebrity culture. Now we have fucked up relationship images, too. 

squadgoals

Grain free chocolate chip cookies. I made these over the weekend. WHY YOU HAVE TO BE SO GOOD? No joke, my family ate like a full dozen (or more) in 2 days. Yes, we’re pigs. Yes, we’re fine with it. 

Calling books “The next Gone Girl“. Stop it. Stop it right now. No book will be the next Gone Girl because Gone Girl was its own book and I read it and I don’t want to read a book that’s the same. A book can be a thriller and mystery and fucked up without being labeled as “the next something”. Also, why can’t we just let the GG phenomenon be its own thing? Why can’t we just enjoy what it was without always looking for its successor?Because by doing that, you’re setting the next book up to fail. It’ll be measured against one singular standard rather than its own merits and that’s not fair to the book or author.

The idea of success as a limited resource. I have always been the type of person who supports friends, family, and coworkers. I try to connect people where I can, collaborate when possible, be a cheerleader for others’ aspirations, and provide help and assistance. I don’t feel that someone else’s success means that there’s none left for me. I believe that there’s room for everyone to be successful and meet their goals and I don’t necessarily view someone doing the same thing as me (like having a blog or podcast or acquiring books or whatever) as competition. Everyone relates and connects differently to others and maybe someone who isn’t a good fit for me is a good fit for you and vice versa. And if we help each other along, don’t we both become more successful? Isn’t that the point? Success isn’t like bread before a snowstorm, in limited quantity and available to the first buyers. There’s plenty to go around, it never runs out, and there’s more than enough for everyone to get a share regardless of when you show up.flower
10PM start times. I don’t watch much TV but I do watch some and I guess it has to do with the nature of what I like to watch but why must all the shows I like start at 10PM? It’s really fucking annoying. Even if I hate commercials, sometimes a girl just wants to watch a show live and not have to go to bed at midnight because of it, you know?

I’m 38 but close enough.

Kesha. What. The. Fuck. I had only been casually following what she’s been dealing with but then when I heard that the court supported Sony and that producer and have kept her legally bound to the man who (allegedly) abused her, I was appalled. Disgusted. Confused. How have we gotten to the point where the safety of women, and by extension, anyone, is less important than a contract? It reminds me too much of what the Duggars did to their children and now, it’s being supported and upheld by a court as okay. It’s not. It never will be. 

My dog, Barkley. No matter where I sit or lay down, that dog must be digging his paws into me. I love him, I really do, but good Lord, is it hard to sleep with 4 paws pressing on your spine.

The fact that I had to name this post after the Rage Against the Machine song “Bulls on Parade” Mostly because it’s been stuck in my head for days. #earworm #atleastitsnotpopmusic

I also wanted to rant about the girl who got fired from Yelp after posting a letter online to the Yelp CEO that she was too poor to afford groceries and rent but I feel like there’s more to that story than we’ve been told and something about the situation isn’t sitting right with me but this topic could be its own post and this one is long enough already. I’d love to hear your thoughts on that if you have some, though.

What are you ranting about?

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33 Comments

  1. Nadine

    I just read about Kesha on the Skimm this morning and what in the actual fuck??? It is so messed up!!! Mac always has to be digging is dagger paws in to me too. Small dog thing? I also agree with everything else you said. Don’t tell me how to be in my relationships with other people, we don’t all want to be the same!!! And every book is it’s own book, damnit!
    Nadine recently posted…Korean BBQ Chicken TacosMy Profile

    Reply
    1. Jana (Post author)

      Dagger paws! It’s true! They’re like little knives poking into my back. All. Night. Long.

      Reply
  2. Kristin

    So many rants so little time, really. I was ranting last night about parents who can’t read instructions (and then I see where the children get it).
    The next Gone Girl thing cracks me up. Like, as soon as the publishing companies hit on a book that everyone (even the illiterate) seemingly enjoy, they just can’t let it go.
    #lifegoals annoys me too…when it’s something as easy as perhaps making pancakes for breakfast. Weirdos.
    The nice thing about west(ish) coast living is that there’s no 10pm start times. Most things I watch start at 7, sometimes 8.

    Reply
    1. Jana (Post author)

      I forgot about #lifegoals That one bugs the shit out of me, too.

      I’m jealous of your TV start times. Not even kidding.

      Reply
  3. Linda sheridan

    Low wages, hardly any benefits. Yelp and all others who take way too much for themselves and expect their employees to be stellar. All who are employed should not slack, either! The rapist going free. Ugh in the whole thing. If only the penis would fall off immediately before a rape could take place ! Celebrities make the media wealthy and the general population feeds it. Not I ! Good rants.
    Have a healthy Tuesday. Love. Steph’s. Momma

    Reply
    1. Jana (Post author)

      I think the high cost of living is a huge factor in this case, too, which always puts an interesting spin on the discussion.

      Reply
      1. Linda sheridan

        Agree wholeheartedly on the cost of living increase. The last 10-15 years coats have skyrocketed!

        Reply
        1. Femme Frugality

          And wealth inequality climbs! I think it’s good that I don’t have too many outlets I frequent that update me on celebrities. Or their newest hashtags. Because I’d probably be in rant mode all the time. That Kesha thing is seriously messed up. We still have a long way to go…
          Femme Frugality recently posted…Around the World in 80 Books: Montenegro and MongoliaMy Profile

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  4. Kelli

    Calling any book the next any other book is always wrong and alway leads to disappointment. Just tell me what YOUR book is about but don’t compare it to someone else’s work.
    Kelli recently posted…Why I’ll Just Say No to NaNoWriMoMy Profile

    Reply
    1. Jana (Post author)

      Exactly!

      Reply
  5. kathy @ more coffee, less talky

    i hated gone girl so any book that claims to be ‘the next gone girl’ i simply ignore šŸ˜€

    and anything that starts past 8pm is too late for me. that’s what PVR is for!

    Reply
    1. Jana (Post author)

      DVR is my most favorite invention ever. I wouldn’t watch anything if it didn’t exist.

      Reply
  6. Tonya@Budget and the Beach

    ha ha I’ve never heard of those hashtags but I don’t think I’m missing much. Word on the success part! It is incredibly appalling to hear what is happening to Kesha. I think it’s good the word is out because I do think she now will get a lot of public support and hopefully that will put pressure on the f’d up system.
    Tonya@Budget and the Beach recently posted…Act Like a Kid and Save Some Money!My Profile

    Reply
    1. Jana (Post author)

      I hope some positive changes come from this terrible Kesha situation. It’s ridiculous, and the whole Taylor Swift donating $250K to her “in support” is making such a mockery of it. She needs actual support. Not money dumped in her bank account.

      Reply
  7. Mackenzie

    Oh my gosh, #squadgoals just annoys the piss out of me. I am so tired of seeing tweets, instagrams, etc… about it. I read that story the other day about the Yelp employee and that is just such a screwed up situation. And no matter what is going on with that story, San Francisco is a super expensive place to live so when she says 80% of her paycheck goes towards rent, I am not surprised.
    Mackenzie recently posted…Monday Meanderings: Last Week of February EditionMy Profile

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    1. Jana (Post author)

      There was an AMAZING response on Business Insider to her post. I’ll have to link to it on Friday. Yes, SF is expensive but from rereading her essay, she seemed to want to plead poverty rather than actually do something about it (more than just complaining). I just feel like there’s more to the story than we actually know. Something isn’t sitting right.

      Reply
  8. SMD @ Life According to Steph

    I have no knowledge of the Yelp situation.

    Kesha situation makes me sick.

    I like to use squad goals hashtags when I appear in photos with my dogs. LOLOLOL

    Yes yes yes to the success rant. It is not a limited resource. I hope we all make it!
    SMD @ Life According to Steph recently posted…Great Makeup on a BudgetMy Profile

    Reply
    1. Jana (Post author)

      That is actually a good, acceptable use of “#squadgoals”.

      Reply
  9. Tanya @ A Mindful Migration

    Let’s be real – “squad” is just a more acceptable (or at least in her wannabe feminist mind) word than clique. But Taylor’s squad is a clique, not a real squad or tribe of friends. I won’t deny that I like Bad Blood (mostly because I like Kendrick Lamar and to be contrary at times) but I hate the whole #squad thing too.

    I definitely don’t believe there is a success threshold, although I will also admit there are times I suffer pangs of envy, which I don’t think is abnormal until all you see is scarcity or jealously. When I feel those pangs, it also reminds me that if I want to succeed, then I gotta do the work. And often times I’m not doing the work, so the choice is clear: do the work or quit whining. Sometimes, to be honest, I gotta whine a little bit longer before I do the work. šŸ™‚

    WTF with the Kesha situation? I don’t get it, but I’m glad she’s getting a lot of support because that is messed up. I agree there is probably more to the Yelp situation than we realize but I didn’t like how the CEO kept referencing same pay in the Phoenix office, which does nothing for the people who live in SF with a much, much higher cost of living.

    I used to live in the Midwest when prime-time shows run from 7-10 pm, when I moved to LA, they run from 8-11 pm, which was a hard adjustment, because work didn’t start later!
    Tanya @ A Mindful Migration recently posted…How To Get Your Twitter Share Counts BackMy Profile

    Reply
    1. Jana (Post author)

      My daughter is a cheerleader so “squad” has a TOTALLY different meaning for us but I 100% agree with your definition of it, too.

      I’m right there with you on the envy and all. It just plucks my nerves when people view you as competition rather than a potential collaborative partner. I’m not out to steal anyone’s business. At all. So let’s work together and see what we can do.

      Reply
  10. Ashley @ The Wandering Weekenders

    I really think that the reason why a lot of people ended up not liking The Girl On The Train was because it was called the next Gone Girl, when in fact it was just a thriller like GG with some really messed up people. Why do all the good shows have to start so late? We’ve been trying to go to bed earlier so we can work out in the morning (sometimes it still doesn’t happen), so we end up missing all of the later shows!
    Ashley @ The Wandering Weekenders recently posted…A Super Hero WeekendMy Profile

    Reply
    1. Jana (Post author)

      I think that’s a good point. People had an expectation of the book because of it’s reviews or feedback and then it just wasn’t that at all.

      Reply
  11. Heather @ I do what I want.

    I will never understand those that aren’t happy for others’ success. It inspires me and makes me happy when others succeed, so I just don’t get it.
    Heather @ I do what I want. recently posted…The WeekendMy Profile

    Reply
  12. Ali A

    You know I love a good rant! Can we discuss how the ODDEST things go viral ie this DAMN DANIEL video (have you seen it?) where a teenager literally keeps screaming “Damnnn Daniel!” at his friend and I can’t even get a blog post to get more than 30 likes on FB?
    Ali A recently posted…Tales of Online DatingMy Profile

    Reply
    1. Jana (Post author)

      I haven’t seen it but I’ve heard of it. I don’t get it. And while we’re talking about shit going viral, Nicole Arbor AGAIN? The best way to get that bitch to shut up is to ignore her. She thrives on all the negative attention because it’s still her 15 minutes. So let’s take it away.

      Reply
  13. Amber

    I’m intrigued by those cookies.

    I know I’ve never used #relationshipgoals. No thanks. And I agree with you on the Gone Girl thing. Just let a book be THAT book.
    Amber recently posted…Hey, It’s Okay Tuesday!My Profile

    Reply
    1. Jana (Post author)

      I’ll share the recipe on Friday.

      Reply
  14. kristen

    i hadn’t heard of most of these things – kesha, yelp. the next ‘anything’ with books annoys me, they never compare and i don’t want them to anyway. i’ve already read that one! also any kind of #goals is just stupid. people are so annoying.

    Reply
  15. lisacng @ expandng.com

    I hate the #goals and related hashtags as well. I’ve got my own goals. I don’t need to achieve someone else’s lifestyle. And I hate when books are called “the next” as well, ESPECIALLY Gone Girl. Authors, be yourselves!
    lisacng @ expandng.com recently posted…Is it sad that Iā€¦.My Profile

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  16. ellesees.net

    RANTS ON PARADE! that’s how i will sing it from now on.
    omg wendy williams on the whole kesha situation–don’t read it unless you want to be mad!!!
    ellesees.net recently posted…Do Heat Protectants Actually Work?My Profile

    Reply
  17. TexErin

    You know what, I’m one of those that didn’t think Gone Girl was as great as it was made out to be. I actually enjoyed the movie more than the book. So…when I see “the next Gone Girl”, they are doing themselves a disservice in my book.

    #squadgoals #relationships goals UGH! You said it!

    So, in Butch Walker’s book, he talks about a very popular/successful/famous producer, doesn’t name him, but it was thinly veiled. He tells of a story where the other producer is sneaky, unethical, and basically steals material that Butch started with an artist. Guess who that producer was. Dr. Luke. Fucker.

    You ask about current rants – here in Australia, this has been recently controversial: a white girl who plays for the national basketball team went to a costume party dressed as Kanye West. In doing so, she painted her skin black. Another teammate who is black complained on social media that it was racist and she was offended. So, there has been a lot of talk about if dressing up in character that is another race, if this is similar to being in blackface and if it is racially inappropriate. That’s been a hot topic “rants on parade” this week.

    Reply
  18. Amanda

    OMGGGG the #relationshipgoals hashtag pisses me off. It’s a fucking picture. Do you have any idea what these people are like in their every day lives together? No. So, basically your goal is just to have cool clothes and do cool things?? Makes no sense.
    Amanda recently posted…Thoughts On A TreadmillMy Profile

    Reply
  19. Kristen

    I read this when you first posted it, but didn’t have time to respond. I really liked this post, though, because I agreed with so much of it! (And also because you were thinking of Rage Against the Machine when you wrote the title and I still love them.)

    I could comment on so much, but I’ll just pick a couple of things.

    The #squadgoals/#relationshipgoals thing is so weird to me. I mean, I’ll admit that I check out various celebrity Instagram posts, but I never feel like I need to be just like them in order to have fun/be happy/whatever. I think the weirdest thing for me to see in the comments on those posts, though, is when someone simply writes #goals and it’s just a picture of a celebrity’s face or something. It just seems kind of sad.

    The “next Gone Girl” thing also annoys the shit out of me. If I were an author and someone called my book “the next Gone Girl,” I’d wonder if it wasn’t good enough to get noticed on its own. It would make me feel like someone decided they needed to slap that label on it because otherwise no one would care enough to seek it out.

    I completely agree about the success thing! I’m a naturally competitive person, but I still like to see other people succeed. If nothing else, people should look at it as an inspiring or motivating thing: like, if this person can do it, maybe I can too!

    The Kesha thing just made me incredibly sad. I haven’t heard/read much beyond the initial ruling, but I found it so upsetting.
    Kristen recently posted…February 2016 Goals and ResultsMy Profile

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