My husband has been away for work for the better part of the past week and since my child keeps inviting friends over, I’ve been housebound which leaves me lots of time to binge watch The Fall (creepy as fuck. Watch it if that’s what you’re into) and have conversations with myself. I’ve written before about all the things I think when I’m alone but let’s revisit that topic, specifically lies I tell myself when my husband is away:
What I say: I’m going to get so much done! I’m going to be so productive! I’ll catch up and even get ahead!
What actually happens: Oh, hello, Netflix.
What I say: I will not freak out over every small noise, creek or thump. My unrealistic paranoia will stay in check!
What I say: I will not eat my body weight in cheese sandwiches and pickles.
What actually happens: I eat my body weight in cheese sandwiches and pickles.
What I say: I will go to bed early and sleep restfully, comfortably and without interruption!
What I say: The child and I will spend quality time together doing projects and talking and playing games.
What actually happens: She hangs out with her friends. I spend time with books and Netflix.
What I say: I will clean the house and do all the laundry and run all the errands so when he comes home, we can just hang out and have fun over the weekend instead of doing all that adulting crap.
What actually happens: I spend a substantial amount of hours on Goodreads, internet shop and pretend like we’re rich and I can buy all the things.
What I say: Everyone will be so calm and peaceful and it’ll be so relaxing to not have to monitor the husband’s ridiculous work schedule for an entire week.
What actually happens: I live in a fucking circus.