Jana Says

Living life from cover to cover

Author Archive: Jana

Weekly six pack, 2017, v19

Quick apology. I know I’m not addressing the horrifying events going on in my country (see: the Philando Castile verdict, Nabra Hassanen, Charleena Lyles #saytheirnames or Missouri SB5 or all the health care bullshit just to name a few things) because I can’t. I simply can’t. Not without setting everything around me ablaze from rage a la Firestarter. I have so many thoughts and feelings and opinions and if I start, I won’t be able to stop. So it’s not that I don’t care. I care probably too much and maybe one day I’ll be able to sort it all out into cohesive thoughts. 

And now, the other stuff. 

Reading. Since We Fell. Picked up The Dinner and Everything Everything from the library (finally!). Got approved for a new NetGalley book that I probably won’t get around to until 4 years after it’s pub date. 

Watching. Nothing new but finishing up Bloodline and season 4 of Orphan Black and Fargo and waiting for Snowfall to start next month (that sounds weird but if you don’t know what the show is, it’s about the beginnings of crack).

Eating. Shrimp with zoodles and pesto. I genuinely have to stop myself from eating it 3 times a day.

Wanting. This tank top, if I wore tank tops. A friend from the gym found it and shared in on my FB and it’s very reflective of how much things have changed for me over the last 9 months. 

Wondering. Why the hell people feel the need to gossip and spread rumors about shit they know nothing about. I get it’s for your own sick enjoyment but really, leave me and my kid out of it. Because if you’re talking about us, you must be REALLY FUCKING BORED. Also, if you want to know why she missed a practice, FUCKING ASK ME. Don’t wonder aloud to people who don’t know us or make up stories. To quote Pink, I’m not here for your entertainment. The people who need to know know and if you don’t, then clearly you’re not one of those people. So shut the fuck up.

Loving. The person I drove behind with a “Ruth is the Truth” bumper sticker. Because as well all know, she is. 

That’s it for this week. Hope you guys have a great weekend and I’ll see you on Tuesday with my recommendations!

 

Things I don’t ever feel like doing

Totally borrowing this idea from Steph.

Running

Laundry

Gardening

Vacuuming

Cleaning the litter box

Ironing

Shoe shopping

Talking to people I don’t like

Going outside in the rain

Crafting

Wearing sleeveless anything. Or shorts

Making waffles

Sitting in traffic

Arguing with uninformed people

Finishing a book I don’t like

Watching reality TV

Golf

Going to Walmart

Making blog images

How about you? What are some things you don’t ever feel like doing?

TV pet peeves

I’ve been watching a lot some TV and movies lately and some shit is really on my nerves. Let’s discuss:

  • Why does no one start a car with a key? How do these magic cars start? 
  • Teeth brushing. Just use some damn toothpaste. Your water isn’t fooling anyone
  • Perfectly decorated and clean houses everywhere. Except when they want to represent poor people. Then the houses are dirty. Like FILTHY. I don’t get that stereotype and quite frankly, it pisses me off. Economic status does not always equal level of cleanliness and organization
  • No one says goodbye when they hang up the phone. Manners exist in real life. Why not movies?
  • All the pushed up against a wall sex. It looks painful and uncomfortable and awkward because hello height differences and are that many people having sex that way?
  • Cheerleader tropes. I’m confident I’ve ranted about this before but honestly, the cheerleaders I know don’t dress or act like that and MAYBE they wouldn’t have to fight against the horrible stereotype movies and TV perpetuate if people who write those tropes would knock it the fuck off See also: buffoon dads
  • WHY SO MUCH VOMIT?
  • Gun usage. Not so much that there is gun usage but more a matter of how does everyone know how to use a gun? I don’t know how to properly use a gun and I was forced to take self-defense and that included dismantling (disarming?) a gun. Still can’t shoot it
  • The perfect manicures and the frequency with which nail polish colors change. You want to show real? Show a woman with chipped nail polish. See also: no wardrobe repeats

Do you have any movie or TV pet peeves?

Weekly six pack, 2017, v18

First full week of summer vacation is in the books! Only 4 million more to go! Although I am enjoying getting to the gym earlier and taking some classes I don’t generally get to take and also being done by 10AM most days. So that’s a perk. Also a perk? Not having to stop whatever I’m doing at 3PM to get the child from school. Parent pickup is my nightmare and 3 months without it? Yes please!

Other than that, here’s a sample of my life this week:

Reading. Bastard Out of Carolina and In the Shadow of Alabama. Picked up Everything Everything from the library. Currently contemplating creating a personal read-a-thon to clear out my Kindle.

Watching. Well, preparing to watch. Bloodline and Kimmy Schmidt. Almost done with this season of OITNB (very mixed feelings) and, to balance it all out, in need of some documentaries. Any suggestions? 

Eating. It’s too fucking hot to cook so I pulled out an old recipe for gazpacho. I made it a little too spicy which mainly the result of me not wanting to cut up a chipotle pepper in adobo sauce or measure the sauce so I used the whole can (pro tip: don’t do that) so I throw some shrimp and avocado in it to offset the spice. It doesn’t help much but it does help a little. 

Wearing. One of my new nail polish colors (Highlight of My Summer) I picked up on my annual birthday Ulta shopping spree. China Glaze is not a brand I use often but I’ve been quite pleased every time I’ve purchased and used their polish. 

Planning. All the things I want to do this summer. It’s a long list and I don’t think my budget is happy with me but right now I give zero fucks. In September I will give lots of fucks, though, which is why I’m trying my hardest to dial things back a bit but CHOICES ARE HARD.

Laughing.  

VERY low key weekend planned since I’ll be spending most of it alone with the husband off on a work trip and the child off to her annual week at my in-laws’ house. I’m looking forward to the quiet and you can bet I have a long list of things I will attempt to accomplish before they get back to make my summer that much lazier easier. 

 

 

Judging Covers with The Family: It’s Back! Again!

It’s been many, many months since we’ve had an edition of Judging Covers but a few weeks ago the child mentioned it and I needed a post idea so here we go. 

For those who are new, this is a series I do where I ask my husband and daughter to deduce the plots of books I’m reading simply by looking at the covers. This month’s edition features a few of the books on my nightstand and none of the books on my Kindle and I figured it was a nice compliment to SUYB. Like a Preview My Books. 

Book #1: In the Shadow of Alabama by Judy Renee Singer

The Child says: I think this is about a family that lives on a farm in Alabama and everyone knows them as a sweet caring family but they aren’t fully who they seem to be. 

The Husband says: I think some people came to Alabama not from Alabama OR some people who don’t fit in Alabama are having to live in Alabama (me: STOP STAYING ALABAMA) and they can’t be who they are because they’re in Alabama.

Goodreads says: Rachel Fleischer has good reasons not to be at her father s deathbed. Foaling season is at hand and her horses are becoming restless and difficult. Her critical mother and grasping sister could certainly handle Marty Fleisher s resistance better without her. But Malachi, her eighty-something horse manager more father to her than Marty has ever been convinces Rachel she will regret it if she doesn t go.

When a stranger at her father’s funeral delivers an odd gift and an apology, Rachel finds herself drawn into the epic story of her father s World War II experience, and the friendships, trauma, scandal, and betrayals that would scar the rest of his life and cast a shadow across the entire family. As she struggles to make sense of his time as a Jewish sergeant in charge of a platoon of black soldiers in 1940s Alabama, she learns more than just his history. She begins to see how his hopes and disappointments mirror her own and might finally give her the means to free herself of the past and choose a life waiting in the wings.

Book #2: A Brief History of Seven Killing by Marlon James

The Child says: It looks like a mad person kills themself and the book explains why.

The Husband says: I think the title is pretty self explanatory but the bird adds nothing. It’s useless. I want to give the bird the bird because it gives me nothing. 

Goodreads says: On December 3, 1976, just before the Jamaican general election and two days before Bob Marley was to play the Smile Jamaica Concert, gunmen stormed his house, machine guns blazing. The attack nearly killed the Reggae superstar, his wife, and his manager, and injured several others. Marley would go on to perform at the free concert on December 5, but he left the country the next day, not to return for two years.

Book #3: Since We Fell by Dennis Lehane

The Child says: I think this is about two people who have a secret in murdering and it about what caused it.  (Child: Am I close? Me: No. Child: It sounds like that’s what it should be about)

The Husband says: I think it’s about since we’ve both left our former lives we’re now in some kind of shitty situation and we’re trying to figure it out together. 

Goodreads says: Since We Fell follows Rachel Childs, a former journalist who, after an on-air mental breakdown, now lives as a virtual shut-in. In all other respects, however, she enjoys an ideal life with an ideal husband. Until a chance encounter on a rainy afternoon causes that ideal life to fray. As does Rachel’s marriage. As does Rachel herself.

Book #4: The You I’ve Never Known by Ellen Hopkins

The Child says: I feel like it’s something related to 13 Reasons Why but instead of the girl having tapes for her classmates it explains all of what happened and how it affected the people who cared about her after what happened happened. 

The Husband says: This one is about woman who has never let you see all the parts of her but if you think about it, over time, you can build a full picture of who she really is. 

Goodreads says: For as long as she can remember, it’s been just Ariel and Dad. Ariel’s mom disappeared when she was a baby. Dad says home is wherever the two of them are, but Ariel is now seventeen and after years of new apartments, new schools, and new faces, all she wants is to put down some roots. Complicating things are Monica and Gabe, both of whom have stirred a different kind of desire.

Maya’s a teenager who’s run from an abusive mother right into the arms of an older man she thinks she can trust. But now she’s isolated with a baby on the way, and life’s getting more complicated than Maya ever could have imagined.

Ariel and Maya’s lives collide unexpectedly when Ariel’s mother shows up out of the blue with wild accusations: Ariel wasn’t abandoned. Her father kidnapped her fourteen years ago.

Not discussed: Bastard Out of Carolina, Better Than Before, The Long Haul: A Trucker’s Tale of Life on the Road

This was an off month for them, especially the child. She usually does a pretty good job of deciphering plots simply based on covers. Or she goes WAY off the deep end and isn’t even close. Like when she asked when I was going to read To Kill a Mockingjay. 

I cannot.